email dated 12/30/08
So even though our Pday is on Thursday, we need to write today because on Thursday all the Cybers will be closed and the bussing isn’t going to go either. Also, because we are such pretty American boys they want us to avoid going outside on new years because there is a great deal of alcohol consumed and that combined with common anti-American sentiments isn’t a good thing. So I am writing today. It wont be much but I do have the chance to throw you all a quick line.
Christmas came and went. It was good because I got a package from home and I got to call home. It was sad because it didn’t really feel like Christmas. It is 100 degrees and they celebrate differently here. Next time Christmas rolls around I will be rolling around on carpet underneath a Christmas Tree. Holidays are just more fun in your own house with your own family. Nothing against the mission, but I am glad this is my last Christmas away from home.
We had a baptism on Sunday. It has been a while since I have had a baptism. It was a baptism of an 11 year old girl named Caroline. In the process of her baptism her parents and grandma and Uncle and cousins have all come to church the last few weeks. Now let’s hope the ward recognizes the family that was missing and RETAINS them. We can’t retain all the members by ourselves and the ward here doesn’t seem to be making much effort. Hometeaching and Visiting teaching is even officially assigned to the missionaries for specific families and persons. Oh ward! Get it together! Missionary work is too stressful.
I have decided that what makes missionary work so hard is that you can’t control your results. In a way you can. You can control your personal development and growth, your studies, etc... but as far as what happens you have no power. Everyone has their agency. It isn’t like school where if you want a better grade you study harder. Sometimes you work your tail off and have nothing, or as is the case with this my latest baptism you had mono and worked half days for a few weeks and had a baptism. There is no method to the madness. The Lord does that on purpose so we don’t become proud I think.
I am still in Cerro, Montevideo. I have been in this area since August and won’t be out until at least February. I just feel like that is such a long time to be in the same area. But I have to be careful not to complain because I could easily stay another transfer after this and be here until about April.
I have found that if you don’t get in any doors for a full day you get really sunburnt, which is the case for me today. Yesterday was all contacts and knocks and fallen appointments until 7:00 at night. And since they took the Siesta from us, that means I was outside from 1 to 7 on my feet in the sun. I hope all those silly missionary sayings "the more you tract the prettier your wife will be" are true, because if so my wife is going to be drop dead gorgeous after yesterday. Or maybe she will be gorgeous on account of how attractive I have become from tanning in the Uruguay sun every day. Correlation does not prove cause and effect. We may never really know why my wife is so beautiful, we will only know that she is.
Anyway, say goodbye to 2008. It has come and gone. I wish you all the best and hope that you make good goals for the new year. Pick a few things you want to change or do different and do them. Don’t make too many goals because you will become overwhelmed and the goals will lose meaning. Make a few. Make em good. Do it. Love y’all!!
Andy
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
Sunday, December 28, 2008
It is better to have found and lost than to never have found at all
email dated 12/8/08
Well... the work has gone better but my companion and I have both been sick. It is by divine placement that we are together. I really believe so. Because if we weren't together we would be wasting two companionship's time. We still have been going out and visiting our investigators. There are frustrations and investigators lost of late that have broken my heart. But you know what they say: it is better to have found and lost than to never have found at all. At least the seed is planted and I believe they will get baptized later. We have a baptism set up for this week that I hope doesn't fall through on us. It is an 11 year old girl and nobody can figure out why she never got baptized. Her whole family is member and the grandma takes the girl to church every week and the girl loves it. She is so cute. Her little sister is 9 and she goes to church every week too. That girl is very cute as well and she will be baptized a few weeks after her sister. Their grandmother is very insistent that these girls know everything about the gospel before they get baptized. Both of them know more than I did when i was baptized, but we respect the wishes of the grandma and their mother and so we will take a few weeks of careful preparation. In the meantime, we can see if that mom will get herself back to church. She needs to figure out what to do with her boyfriend though. He isn't very interested and she isn't very keen on the church scene because "everyone looks at her, ya know". But she is willing to go to the baptism. I think that a majority of the time, the people that feel judged are making it all up in their mind. They feel bad about what they did or are doing and they assume that everyone thinks less of them for it.
So it is Christmas in Uruguay!! I hope you all know what that means!! A year ago I was here for Christmas. And I am here for Christmas again. Ere go, this will be the very last Christmas I have to spend away from HOME!!! But I am not trunky.
Christmas in the Guay is very different. There are Christmas trees. But everything else seems different. It is so hot and the real celebration is the 24th, "la noche buena", when everybody blows up fireworks, drinks, and opens all the presents that Papa Noel would have brought had they all gone to sleep. I don't understand how their kids believe in Santa Claus here, but they still talk about that jolly old man. The fireworks are incredible. It is a show that wouldn't be legal in the United States. But there is no risk here, none of the houses are made of wood. Anyway, it literally seems like a war zone. Bombs bursting in the air, explosions for todos lados for 30 minutes... it is cool.
Mostly I am excited to call home. And get my Christmas package. Other than that, Christmas season on the mission is just not very special.
We did have our special Choir Performance, which turned out VERY WELL!!! We filled our stake center with over 800 people to hear it, and it was such a hit we are putting on the concert in Colonia this Saturday. Colonia is the richer part of the country where we don't have many baptisms. I really want to go there. The songs were very powerful and we are making a DVD so I will be able to mail one home soon and you all can see what a good choir it really was. It was fun. Some of the investigators that came left the concert resolved to get baptized. They weren't my investigators, but I thought that was a cool story.
I don't have much more to say as of right now. I hope that you are all well and that you are keeping your noses clean. Keep the Bumpus dogs away from our Christmas turkey and don't use soap boy on Luke's mouth if he swears...we wouldn't want him to get soap poisoning and go blind.
Take care!! Love yáll!!!
Andy
Well... the work has gone better but my companion and I have both been sick. It is by divine placement that we are together. I really believe so. Because if we weren't together we would be wasting two companionship's time. We still have been going out and visiting our investigators. There are frustrations and investigators lost of late that have broken my heart. But you know what they say: it is better to have found and lost than to never have found at all. At least the seed is planted and I believe they will get baptized later. We have a baptism set up for this week that I hope doesn't fall through on us. It is an 11 year old girl and nobody can figure out why she never got baptized. Her whole family is member and the grandma takes the girl to church every week and the girl loves it. She is so cute. Her little sister is 9 and she goes to church every week too. That girl is very cute as well and she will be baptized a few weeks after her sister. Their grandmother is very insistent that these girls know everything about the gospel before they get baptized. Both of them know more than I did when i was baptized, but we respect the wishes of the grandma and their mother and so we will take a few weeks of careful preparation. In the meantime, we can see if that mom will get herself back to church. She needs to figure out what to do with her boyfriend though. He isn't very interested and she isn't very keen on the church scene because "everyone looks at her, ya know". But she is willing to go to the baptism. I think that a majority of the time, the people that feel judged are making it all up in their mind. They feel bad about what they did or are doing and they assume that everyone thinks less of them for it.
So it is Christmas in Uruguay!! I hope you all know what that means!! A year ago I was here for Christmas. And I am here for Christmas again. Ere go, this will be the very last Christmas I have to spend away from HOME!!! But I am not trunky.
Christmas in the Guay is very different. There are Christmas trees. But everything else seems different. It is so hot and the real celebration is the 24th, "la noche buena", when everybody blows up fireworks, drinks, and opens all the presents that Papa Noel would have brought had they all gone to sleep. I don't understand how their kids believe in Santa Claus here, but they still talk about that jolly old man. The fireworks are incredible. It is a show that wouldn't be legal in the United States. But there is no risk here, none of the houses are made of wood. Anyway, it literally seems like a war zone. Bombs bursting in the air, explosions for todos lados for 30 minutes... it is cool.
Mostly I am excited to call home. And get my Christmas package. Other than that, Christmas season on the mission is just not very special.
We did have our special Choir Performance, which turned out VERY WELL!!! We filled our stake center with over 800 people to hear it, and it was such a hit we are putting on the concert in Colonia this Saturday. Colonia is the richer part of the country where we don't have many baptisms. I really want to go there. The songs were very powerful and we are making a DVD so I will be able to mail one home soon and you all can see what a good choir it really was. It was fun. Some of the investigators that came left the concert resolved to get baptized. They weren't my investigators, but I thought that was a cool story.
I don't have much more to say as of right now. I hope that you are all well and that you are keeping your noses clean. Keep the Bumpus dogs away from our Christmas turkey and don't use soap boy on Luke's mouth if he swears...we wouldn't want him to get soap poisoning and go blind.
Take care!! Love yáll!!!
Andy
So Complicated
email dated 11/25/08
This week is complicated because of interviews and because of our choir concert and because my companion and I have both been out sick. P-Day was yesterday but I only felt good enough to go out and do email for 30 minutes before feeling faint and wanting to go home. Being today P-Day for many other parts of the mission, I am justifying writing home today because a man in our ward suggested that we use the church computers in the family history center, right across the street from us, to do our emails.
So I won't have any good stories for this week because my companion and I couldn't go out after Tuesday of last week. It is lucky that we were both sick at the same time. It made it easy to rest because we didn't feel bad staying in knowing that the other had to stay in as well. I am starting to feel better, but my companion sounds and feels the same as a week ago. If this keeps up as I start feeling better we will have to do divisions all week so that I can go out and work. I prefer to work with my companion and not have to do divisions with members so I ask that you all pray for Elder Stevenson so that he can recover and we can resume work as usual.
Last week I wrote about a very sensitive matter. My main goal behind that was to inform you all that this hasn't been easy for me. You all know how I am politically and you all know that I am a devout Latter Day Saint. I felt torn. In this current situation it seemed that faith and politics were pulled into the same plane. That complicated things for me. It still isn't easy, but I stand by everything I said last week.
The Book of Mormon is true! Every other issue, WITHOUT EXCEPTION, pales in comparison. Because when I know that the Book of Mormon is true, I know that Jesus Christ is my Savior and that His church is on the earth today. Elder David A. Bednar of the Council of the Twelve came to the MTC while I was there. I remember his talk as if it were yesterday. He talked about the 13 Articles of Faith, and how every question or doubt our investigators may have we can take it back to the basic steps of the Articles of Faith. If our investigator asks "why didn't blacks get the priesthood until 1978.." they aren't asking about the priesthood. Their doubt is whether or not Joseph Smith was a prophet. If they ask about polygamy, again the same thing. And now the personal application, if I ask about gay marriage, indeed a very difficult issue for me in our times, etc... My confusion very well may be whether or not it is appropriate for the church to get involved in the issue, but the doubt doesn't change. Did a 14 year old boy see God the Father and Jesus Christ 200 years ago? I don't understand everything. But I can have no doubt that the Book of Mormon is true. And I have no doubt about that book. And with that testimony I can face any difficult to understand topic, because whether or not the answer to the question is attainable in this life, I can rest assured that if I do as the Book of Mormon teaches me and as my Savior teaches me, the answer will be revealed unto me.
"There is nothing which is secret save it shall be revealed, there is no work of darkness save it shall be made manifest in the light, and there is nothing which is sealed upon the earth save it shall be loosed." (2 Nephi 30:17)
"Behold, great and marvelous are the works of the Lord. How unsearchable are the depths of the mysteries of him. And it is impossible that man should find out all his ways. And no man knoweth of his ways save it be revealed unto him. Wherefore brethren, despise not the revelations of God." (Jacob 4:8)
"For behold he judgeth, and his judgment is just. and the infant perisheth not that dieth in his infancy, but men drink damnation to their own souls except they humble themselves and become as little children, and believe that salvation was, and is, and is to come, in and through the atoning blood of Christ." (Mosiah 3:18)
"And now behold, my brethren, what natural man is there that knoweth these things? I say unto you, there is none that knoweth these things, save the penitent." (Alma 26:21)
"And when ye shall receive these things, I would exhort you that ye would ask God, the Eternal Father, in the name of Christ, if these things are not true. And if ye shall ask with sincere heart, with real intent, having faith in Christ, he will manifest the truth of it unto you by the power of the Holy Ghost. And by the power of the Holy Ghost ye may know the truth of all things." (Moroni 10:4-5)
I have tried the Lord. I have read that book more times than I can count. I cannot deny the feelings and the impressions that come to me when I read it. My mind truly has been enlightened by the Spirit many times. I know that my feelings and my testimony are not as convincing on paper as a well written persuasive essay. Nor does my testimony obey the rules of intellectual discussion. I am aware that my testimony can be ridiculed as something indiscernible and blind, and placing too much trust in 12 old and imperfect men. But when I choose to be a member of the church and follow the counsel of the quorum of the 12 Apostles, that is not blind following. Because if I choose to follow them, it is only on account of the testimony that I personally attained through my study of the Holy Scriptures and their words today. I know that I do my best to choose the right. After so much inner battle wondering if my heart is really pure, I tell you today, my heart is pure in this. I did not come to these conclusions because of my friends or my family guided me through this. Rather, I arrived at these conclusions only after COUNTLESS hours of critical analysis, meditation, and sincere prayer.
I bear witness that the Book of Mormon is true. There is a power in that book that is indescribable. I bear witness because I have seen with my own eyes the lives of many persons changed in miraculous ways because of that book. It answers the questions of our souls, whatever they may be. It guides us to a path of good, tolerant, christian action if we abide by its teachings. But even more, it is better than a good book that helps us to be good neighbors and do good things. It contains the words to eternal life.
Remember Jesus with his disciples in the book of John chapter 6 when talking about the sacrament:"when they had heard this, they said this is a hard saying, who can hear it?...From that time many of his disciples went back, and walked no more with him." (John 6:60, 66)"Then said Jesus unto the twelve, will ye also go away? Then Simon Peter answered him, Lord to whom shall we go? Thou hast the words of eternal life." (John 6: 67-68)
I doubted my faith and to some extent, I still don't know, considered going home. I read the Book of Mormon again. And I heard these words from the book of John spoken to my mind, as I finished the book of Alma. Where on Earth would I go? I don't want to just be in a good path. I want to be in the right path. I want the "words of eternal life."
I know the scriptures are true and that the Lord is aware of each and every one of us. Jesus Christ is His son and He did come to this Earth and pay the price for ALL of us. There is no other name given whereby mankind may be saved. "Everything that is unfair about life will be made right through the infinite Atonement of our Savior." (President Gordon B. Hinckley) I place my trust in Him and trust that if I sincerely try and do what is right, He won't let me falter too far. "ask and ye shall receive", "if any of ye lack wisdom, let him ask of God." That is what I did.
I pray this testimony is as humble as possible. We all have our doubts. We all face our "hard sayings to hear". Whether it be gay marriage or living prophets or a really bad bishop, we must face the difficult situation as did Peter of old and ask ourselves and the Lord Himself "Where would we go when He has the words of eternal life." It is more than good path. It is the correct path.
I love you all so much!!
Andy
This week is complicated because of interviews and because of our choir concert and because my companion and I have both been out sick. P-Day was yesterday but I only felt good enough to go out and do email for 30 minutes before feeling faint and wanting to go home. Being today P-Day for many other parts of the mission, I am justifying writing home today because a man in our ward suggested that we use the church computers in the family history center, right across the street from us, to do our emails.
So I won't have any good stories for this week because my companion and I couldn't go out after Tuesday of last week. It is lucky that we were both sick at the same time. It made it easy to rest because we didn't feel bad staying in knowing that the other had to stay in as well. I am starting to feel better, but my companion sounds and feels the same as a week ago. If this keeps up as I start feeling better we will have to do divisions all week so that I can go out and work. I prefer to work with my companion and not have to do divisions with members so I ask that you all pray for Elder Stevenson so that he can recover and we can resume work as usual.
Last week I wrote about a very sensitive matter. My main goal behind that was to inform you all that this hasn't been easy for me. You all know how I am politically and you all know that I am a devout Latter Day Saint. I felt torn. In this current situation it seemed that faith and politics were pulled into the same plane. That complicated things for me. It still isn't easy, but I stand by everything I said last week.
The Book of Mormon is true! Every other issue, WITHOUT EXCEPTION, pales in comparison. Because when I know that the Book of Mormon is true, I know that Jesus Christ is my Savior and that His church is on the earth today. Elder David A. Bednar of the Council of the Twelve came to the MTC while I was there. I remember his talk as if it were yesterday. He talked about the 13 Articles of Faith, and how every question or doubt our investigators may have we can take it back to the basic steps of the Articles of Faith. If our investigator asks "why didn't blacks get the priesthood until 1978.." they aren't asking about the priesthood. Their doubt is whether or not Joseph Smith was a prophet. If they ask about polygamy, again the same thing. And now the personal application, if I ask about gay marriage, indeed a very difficult issue for me in our times, etc... My confusion very well may be whether or not it is appropriate for the church to get involved in the issue, but the doubt doesn't change. Did a 14 year old boy see God the Father and Jesus Christ 200 years ago? I don't understand everything. But I can have no doubt that the Book of Mormon is true. And I have no doubt about that book. And with that testimony I can face any difficult to understand topic, because whether or not the answer to the question is attainable in this life, I can rest assured that if I do as the Book of Mormon teaches me and as my Savior teaches me, the answer will be revealed unto me.
"There is nothing which is secret save it shall be revealed, there is no work of darkness save it shall be made manifest in the light, and there is nothing which is sealed upon the earth save it shall be loosed." (2 Nephi 30:17)
"Behold, great and marvelous are the works of the Lord. How unsearchable are the depths of the mysteries of him. And it is impossible that man should find out all his ways. And no man knoweth of his ways save it be revealed unto him. Wherefore brethren, despise not the revelations of God." (Jacob 4:8)
"For behold he judgeth, and his judgment is just. and the infant perisheth not that dieth in his infancy, but men drink damnation to their own souls except they humble themselves and become as little children, and believe that salvation was, and is, and is to come, in and through the atoning blood of Christ." (Mosiah 3:18)
"And now behold, my brethren, what natural man is there that knoweth these things? I say unto you, there is none that knoweth these things, save the penitent." (Alma 26:21)
"And when ye shall receive these things, I would exhort you that ye would ask God, the Eternal Father, in the name of Christ, if these things are not true. And if ye shall ask with sincere heart, with real intent, having faith in Christ, he will manifest the truth of it unto you by the power of the Holy Ghost. And by the power of the Holy Ghost ye may know the truth of all things." (Moroni 10:4-5)
I have tried the Lord. I have read that book more times than I can count. I cannot deny the feelings and the impressions that come to me when I read it. My mind truly has been enlightened by the Spirit many times. I know that my feelings and my testimony are not as convincing on paper as a well written persuasive essay. Nor does my testimony obey the rules of intellectual discussion. I am aware that my testimony can be ridiculed as something indiscernible and blind, and placing too much trust in 12 old and imperfect men. But when I choose to be a member of the church and follow the counsel of the quorum of the 12 Apostles, that is not blind following. Because if I choose to follow them, it is only on account of the testimony that I personally attained through my study of the Holy Scriptures and their words today. I know that I do my best to choose the right. After so much inner battle wondering if my heart is really pure, I tell you today, my heart is pure in this. I did not come to these conclusions because of my friends or my family guided me through this. Rather, I arrived at these conclusions only after COUNTLESS hours of critical analysis, meditation, and sincere prayer.
I bear witness that the Book of Mormon is true. There is a power in that book that is indescribable. I bear witness because I have seen with my own eyes the lives of many persons changed in miraculous ways because of that book. It answers the questions of our souls, whatever they may be. It guides us to a path of good, tolerant, christian action if we abide by its teachings. But even more, it is better than a good book that helps us to be good neighbors and do good things. It contains the words to eternal life.
Remember Jesus with his disciples in the book of John chapter 6 when talking about the sacrament:"when they had heard this, they said this is a hard saying, who can hear it?...From that time many of his disciples went back, and walked no more with him." (John 6:60, 66)"Then said Jesus unto the twelve, will ye also go away? Then Simon Peter answered him, Lord to whom shall we go? Thou hast the words of eternal life." (John 6: 67-68)
I doubted my faith and to some extent, I still don't know, considered going home. I read the Book of Mormon again. And I heard these words from the book of John spoken to my mind, as I finished the book of Alma. Where on Earth would I go? I don't want to just be in a good path. I want to be in the right path. I want the "words of eternal life."
I know the scriptures are true and that the Lord is aware of each and every one of us. Jesus Christ is His son and He did come to this Earth and pay the price for ALL of us. There is no other name given whereby mankind may be saved. "Everything that is unfair about life will be made right through the infinite Atonement of our Savior." (President Gordon B. Hinckley) I place my trust in Him and trust that if I sincerely try and do what is right, He won't let me falter too far. "ask and ye shall receive", "if any of ye lack wisdom, let him ask of God." That is what I did.
I pray this testimony is as humble as possible. We all have our doubts. We all face our "hard sayings to hear". Whether it be gay marriage or living prophets or a really bad bishop, we must face the difficult situation as did Peter of old and ask ourselves and the Lord Himself "Where would we go when He has the words of eternal life." It is more than good path. It is the correct path.
I love you all so much!!
Andy
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
Official Statement
email dated 11/17/08
Oh the mission continues for me. It is hard for me to know what to write about these days because I don’t want my mail home to be boring. Rest assured that I write stories in my journal, but I am afraid too many stories full of names of people you don’t know will be boring. Furthermore, a lot of stories are also very personal and sacred spiritual experiences, and I fear, that if I always try writing home "AMAZING" experiences, I will start viewing my mission experiences as news report articles to be printed and I will be searching always for the next hot story to tell. That isn’t what these experiences are for and so, if you have noticed my emails lack stories lately, part of that is my new way of thinking. "You can’t force spiritual things" (President Boyd K Packer). I don’t want to start looking for things to report. If I feel so inspired some days, I may share some amazing experiences that I have. For the most part, that is how I have been writing during these last 5 months. So if my emails seem self-centered, over self-analytical, etc... I believe it is because I am talking too much about how I feel in an attempt to not write too many stories.
While we are on the topic of how I feel, I did want to address one issue that is a sharp topic in the modern world: gay marriage. I have always had a hard time with this issue. I try so hard to be a tolerant and a loving person, and I would never want to be guilty of ignorant or intolerant behavior toward any group of persons. That is what has made gay marriage such a difficult topic for me.
The church has officially come out in favor of the family, stating that "marriage is between man and woman." We are all familiar with the Proclamation to the World.
I am more than a member, a missionary, of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. And I admit that when I became aware that the church was spending tithing money to be involved in the political debate going on in California over gay marriage and proposition 8, I didn’t know what to think. I felt like a piece of paper that had been gripped by 1st grade kids and that they were ripping in opposite directions.
I remember a time in high school when a group of kids in their "straight pride shirts" asked me if I would join them in their "anti-protest of the gay protestors" that was currently going on. When I said “no” and was called a "fag lover," I remember being proud of that later and I thought of Atticus Finch--that "nigger lover" from To Kill A Mockingbird, which is one of my favorite books.
I had always personally felt that Civil Unions wouldn’t be bad. I wanted the debate to end so it would stop yanking at me. Even more, I felt that gay persons deserved rights to insurance benefits just like any other married people could do. I thought a Civil Union would make sense and end a very severe debate. I was always very frustrated at what I viewed as "hateful intolerance" and the way many use the word "gay" as an insult. Those things made me sad.
Anyway, so that was how I felt. For a long time I rarely thought about it, I went to college, found homework and a girlfriend occupied my time just fine, etc... It wasn’t until just a few months ago, when the debate over proposition 8 was going on in California that my passions were ignited again. There are a lot of missionaries from California in my zone for some reason I found myself receiving weekly news on the debate.
My official statement is this: intolerant behavior is making me sad. For a while I thought I was mad at the church for spending tithing money when not every member of the church was going to agree with those politics. With time I found myself understanding a little better. The church is not fighting against gays or liberals, rather they are only standing up on one issue in an attempt to protect the family institution. They have been mispainted and that does bother me. Even more, I do not enjoy that many liberals claiming to be fighting for tolerance and civil rights are often completely hateful and intolerant of those that don’t see this issue their way. I have been thinking about all my wonderful and conservative friends who I know stand for the marriage between man a woman, and, in my consideration of their character, I found not one drop of intolerance, ignorance, or hatred. I recognized that my anti-intolerant sentiments that I had formerly aimed at conservative people had sometimes been misplaced and undeserved. As I think about the LDS people, I know a people that is loving and tolerant and doing their best to try to make a good society, one that they feel comfortable raising their children in. I do not see hateful anti-gay people as I once did. It was important for me to recognize that.
With my head finally cleared, I was able to consider the issue in a different light. I still personally have a hard time with the whole thing, but I officially state that I do not believe the church is extremist or out of place in its stance. The official church statement is anything but extremist. Firstly, they said that they made a stance, even still knowing that many "good active members" may not agree. They aren’t trying to tell everyone what to say. Furthermore, it has been stated that the church is not opposed to hospitalization, insurance rights, etc... of gay persons. Simply put, the church would allow for such rights as long as they come by any other means than gay marriage, because the family institution is too sacred and they view marriage as between a man and a woman.
One trend in recent history that I fear is what I call the liberalization of society. As a historian, I love liberals. I always have and do. They fight for freedom and liberty, they beat tyrannical monarchs, they brought religious freedom to western civilization, they fought against slavery, they fought for women to have the right to vote, they fought for civil rights, etc... All things that always felt passionate about and loved. My fear is this: in the last 40 years the liberalization of society has been unprecedented in speed, and it has lots of momentum. Without opposition, we have the extremist enemy that we always talk about in the Shepherd house. I am proud of the church for playing a crucial part in the political process. "It must needs be that there be opposition in all things." Furthermore, I am proud of church members for coming together and working so hard— even if I still personally struggle with where I would stand politically.
LET COMPASSION REIGN!! It makes me sad when my companions from California show me their mail, and I read that their fathers have been spit on in the face by protestors, that their church meetings were interrupted by screaming persons in sacrament meeting shouting, "YOU HATEFUL MORMONS! DAMN YOU ALL TO HELL!" That makes me sad. I wish that man could hear himself. It makes me sad that church leaders have had to change their phone numbers and stay in the house and turn the music up to try and ignore screaming protestors outside their houses. My heart aches for a people that I personally know and love. They don’t deserve to be treated this way, especially when they have done nothing more than what their opponents are doing--which is get involved in the freedom of the American process to vote and stand up for what they believe.
This is lengthy and so I need to end here. I have no negative feelings towards the church with regards to this issue. I am a Latter Day Saint. Furthermore, I believe that Joseph Smith was a prophet, despite any imperfections he may have had, and I believe that the current Prophets and Apostles are called of God to lead us in the present day. I know the church is true. I know the Book of Mormon is the word of God. I know the fundamental necessary truths to keep me on a path of righteousness. I am doing my best to choose the right. It is hard to stand up for what is right when it seems all the ground has gotten dirty. I want you all to know that this issue hasn’t been easy for me, and I am sure it isn’t easy for all of you either because I know your passions and hearts too. But let it be said that we can’t forget the important things which are our faith in God and our families. Those have more value than anything else.
Take care, my dear family!! I love you!!!
Andy
Oh the mission continues for me. It is hard for me to know what to write about these days because I don’t want my mail home to be boring. Rest assured that I write stories in my journal, but I am afraid too many stories full of names of people you don’t know will be boring. Furthermore, a lot of stories are also very personal and sacred spiritual experiences, and I fear, that if I always try writing home "AMAZING" experiences, I will start viewing my mission experiences as news report articles to be printed and I will be searching always for the next hot story to tell. That isn’t what these experiences are for and so, if you have noticed my emails lack stories lately, part of that is my new way of thinking. "You can’t force spiritual things" (President Boyd K Packer). I don’t want to start looking for things to report. If I feel so inspired some days, I may share some amazing experiences that I have. For the most part, that is how I have been writing during these last 5 months. So if my emails seem self-centered, over self-analytical, etc... I believe it is because I am talking too much about how I feel in an attempt to not write too many stories.
While we are on the topic of how I feel, I did want to address one issue that is a sharp topic in the modern world: gay marriage. I have always had a hard time with this issue. I try so hard to be a tolerant and a loving person, and I would never want to be guilty of ignorant or intolerant behavior toward any group of persons. That is what has made gay marriage such a difficult topic for me.
The church has officially come out in favor of the family, stating that "marriage is between man and woman." We are all familiar with the Proclamation to the World.
I am more than a member, a missionary, of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. And I admit that when I became aware that the church was spending tithing money to be involved in the political debate going on in California over gay marriage and proposition 8, I didn’t know what to think. I felt like a piece of paper that had been gripped by 1st grade kids and that they were ripping in opposite directions.
I remember a time in high school when a group of kids in their "straight pride shirts" asked me if I would join them in their "anti-protest of the gay protestors" that was currently going on. When I said “no” and was called a "fag lover," I remember being proud of that later and I thought of Atticus Finch--that "nigger lover" from To Kill A Mockingbird, which is one of my favorite books.
I had always personally felt that Civil Unions wouldn’t be bad. I wanted the debate to end so it would stop yanking at me. Even more, I felt that gay persons deserved rights to insurance benefits just like any other married people could do. I thought a Civil Union would make sense and end a very severe debate. I was always very frustrated at what I viewed as "hateful intolerance" and the way many use the word "gay" as an insult. Those things made me sad.
Anyway, so that was how I felt. For a long time I rarely thought about it, I went to college, found homework and a girlfriend occupied my time just fine, etc... It wasn’t until just a few months ago, when the debate over proposition 8 was going on in California that my passions were ignited again. There are a lot of missionaries from California in my zone for some reason I found myself receiving weekly news on the debate.
My official statement is this: intolerant behavior is making me sad. For a while I thought I was mad at the church for spending tithing money when not every member of the church was going to agree with those politics. With time I found myself understanding a little better. The church is not fighting against gays or liberals, rather they are only standing up on one issue in an attempt to protect the family institution. They have been mispainted and that does bother me. Even more, I do not enjoy that many liberals claiming to be fighting for tolerance and civil rights are often completely hateful and intolerant of those that don’t see this issue their way. I have been thinking about all my wonderful and conservative friends who I know stand for the marriage between man a woman, and, in my consideration of their character, I found not one drop of intolerance, ignorance, or hatred. I recognized that my anti-intolerant sentiments that I had formerly aimed at conservative people had sometimes been misplaced and undeserved. As I think about the LDS people, I know a people that is loving and tolerant and doing their best to try to make a good society, one that they feel comfortable raising their children in. I do not see hateful anti-gay people as I once did. It was important for me to recognize that.
With my head finally cleared, I was able to consider the issue in a different light. I still personally have a hard time with the whole thing, but I officially state that I do not believe the church is extremist or out of place in its stance. The official church statement is anything but extremist. Firstly, they said that they made a stance, even still knowing that many "good active members" may not agree. They aren’t trying to tell everyone what to say. Furthermore, it has been stated that the church is not opposed to hospitalization, insurance rights, etc... of gay persons. Simply put, the church would allow for such rights as long as they come by any other means than gay marriage, because the family institution is too sacred and they view marriage as between a man and a woman.
One trend in recent history that I fear is what I call the liberalization of society. As a historian, I love liberals. I always have and do. They fight for freedom and liberty, they beat tyrannical monarchs, they brought religious freedom to western civilization, they fought against slavery, they fought for women to have the right to vote, they fought for civil rights, etc... All things that always felt passionate about and loved. My fear is this: in the last 40 years the liberalization of society has been unprecedented in speed, and it has lots of momentum. Without opposition, we have the extremist enemy that we always talk about in the Shepherd house. I am proud of the church for playing a crucial part in the political process. "It must needs be that there be opposition in all things." Furthermore, I am proud of church members for coming together and working so hard— even if I still personally struggle with where I would stand politically.
LET COMPASSION REIGN!! It makes me sad when my companions from California show me their mail, and I read that their fathers have been spit on in the face by protestors, that their church meetings were interrupted by screaming persons in sacrament meeting shouting, "YOU HATEFUL MORMONS! DAMN YOU ALL TO HELL!" That makes me sad. I wish that man could hear himself. It makes me sad that church leaders have had to change their phone numbers and stay in the house and turn the music up to try and ignore screaming protestors outside their houses. My heart aches for a people that I personally know and love. They don’t deserve to be treated this way, especially when they have done nothing more than what their opponents are doing--which is get involved in the freedom of the American process to vote and stand up for what they believe.
This is lengthy and so I need to end here. I have no negative feelings towards the church with regards to this issue. I am a Latter Day Saint. Furthermore, I believe that Joseph Smith was a prophet, despite any imperfections he may have had, and I believe that the current Prophets and Apostles are called of God to lead us in the present day. I know the church is true. I know the Book of Mormon is the word of God. I know the fundamental necessary truths to keep me on a path of righteousness. I am doing my best to choose the right. It is hard to stand up for what is right when it seems all the ground has gotten dirty. I want you all to know that this issue hasn’t been easy for me, and I am sure it isn’t easy for all of you either because I know your passions and hearts too. But let it be said that we can’t forget the important things which are our faith in God and our families. Those have more value than anything else.
Take care, my dear family!! I love you!!!
Andy
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
I Haven't Forgotten
email dated 11/11/08
This will be really short because ya se me fue el tiempo. You all responded like true friends to my complaint of 0 messages and I had email today. I was doing all sorts of other little tasks like burning CDs for some converts and such and I lost my time.
I am staying here with Elder Stevenson for a 3rd transfer! In fact, our entire house of 4 stayed!! That will make 5 months of my mission with Elder Stevenson and Elder Ballard and Elder Ahlstrom. I am not complaining about that! I LOVE MY COMPANIONS!!! They have been real friends and real helps for me.
We are having success in our area and the mission continues to be an adventure. I love being a missionary and I am very happy these days. I hope that you are all doing well! I will write a better email next week.
I love you all!! Take care!!
Andy
This will be really short because ya se me fue el tiempo. You all responded like true friends to my complaint of 0 messages and I had email today. I was doing all sorts of other little tasks like burning CDs for some converts and such and I lost my time.
I am staying here with Elder Stevenson for a 3rd transfer! In fact, our entire house of 4 stayed!! That will make 5 months of my mission with Elder Stevenson and Elder Ballard and Elder Ahlstrom. I am not complaining about that! I LOVE MY COMPANIONS!!! They have been real friends and real helps for me.
We are having success in our area and the mission continues to be an adventure. I love being a missionary and I am very happy these days. I hope that you are all doing well! I will write a better email next week.
I love you all!! Take care!!
Andy
Monday, November 3, 2008
Empty Inbox
email dated 11/3/08
So, my rage is kindled against everyone today. 0 messages!? My forgiveness will pour out upon you all when I receive mail next week.
I don’t really know what to say.
So let’s start with how the work is going: we have a few families we are teaching but everyone needs to get married. Miguel and Rosario are my favorites. They are soo cool. And Miguel actually lived in the United States for a while as an illegal alien working 20 hours a day in a movie theater. They have agreed to be baptized and he went today to go and ask for a date from the gobierno. Getting married here is kind of a chore. And one fun interesting fact: members here can’t get married in the temple. They have to get married first, and then go and get sealed the next day, because you cannot be married by any other church than the Catholic church. The government hasn’t given permission to any other groups.
I am healthy and getting along with my companion Elder Stevenson. We are probably going to be staying together another change because of a special missionary choir that the president asked us to be in. In Montevideo he packed it with musical missionaries and we are going to be putting on a professional concert. We have 3 practices a week for 3 hours every practice!! Sometimes I feel like I am not on a mission, but it is fun being in the choir. President has said that he expects numbers to go up with the choir, not down. So we have to work doubly hard. The idea behind the choir is to spread the church name in a good way. The people down here will go to a free concert and they love music. And we are actually a really good choir. I am impressed.
I hope that everyone is doing well. I wouldn’t know if you are or not…zing! Take care and don’t forget to write a missionary, even if he has been out for longer than a year and is closer to coming home and on the downhill slide. I still have 11 months! Take care! Love y'all!!
Andy
So, my rage is kindled against everyone today. 0 messages!? My forgiveness will pour out upon you all when I receive mail next week.
I don’t really know what to say.
So let’s start with how the work is going: we have a few families we are teaching but everyone needs to get married. Miguel and Rosario are my favorites. They are soo cool. And Miguel actually lived in the United States for a while as an illegal alien working 20 hours a day in a movie theater. They have agreed to be baptized and he went today to go and ask for a date from the gobierno. Getting married here is kind of a chore. And one fun interesting fact: members here can’t get married in the temple. They have to get married first, and then go and get sealed the next day, because you cannot be married by any other church than the Catholic church. The government hasn’t given permission to any other groups.
I am healthy and getting along with my companion Elder Stevenson. We are probably going to be staying together another change because of a special missionary choir that the president asked us to be in. In Montevideo he packed it with musical missionaries and we are going to be putting on a professional concert. We have 3 practices a week for 3 hours every practice!! Sometimes I feel like I am not on a mission, but it is fun being in the choir. President has said that he expects numbers to go up with the choir, not down. So we have to work doubly hard. The idea behind the choir is to spread the church name in a good way. The people down here will go to a free concert and they love music. And we are actually a really good choir. I am impressed.
I hope that everyone is doing well. I wouldn’t know if you are or not…zing! Take care and don’t forget to write a missionary, even if he has been out for longer than a year and is closer to coming home and on the downhill slide. I still have 11 months! Take care! Love y'all!!
Andy
Monday, October 27, 2008
We are locked in
email 10/27/08
So we had a very fun experience: my companion and I and Elder Ballard and Elder Ahlstrom. We went to district meeting on Tuesday in the chapel in Paso Molino with the whole zone. I had left my scriptures upstairs and went up to get them, and they followed me up because we were all going to go to lunch together. As we came back down the stairs the Elders with the keys had already locked up and left. Now, in any chapel I have seen in the United States, this is a very easy to fix problem. Push. Not here. We didn’t even have an accessible phone!! We laughed at first and then realized that the situation was actually pretty serious. We were locked in with no way out because there are caged doors if we manage to get through the glass. (We are in a rough neighborhood.) And the best part is that nobody was going to be using that chapel for a few days. The soonest someone would be coming in would have been Thursday. So, unless we got some help we were in for the long haul, or until someone realized we were missing and came looking for us. We were stuck inside for 7 hours. We went to a window that faced the street and yelled for help for 7 hours and we were literally and straight-faced ignored by over 100 people. Around 6:30 a man with his daughter was walking by and he would have ignored me too but I finally screamed in disbelief, "are you really going to ignore me, sir? Are you kidding me?!? I have been here for 7 hours!" and he came up to the gate of the chapel and said, "what do you want me to do?" It was really easy once somebody finally stopped to help. He used his cell phone and we were free 20 minutes later.
Anyway, it turns out that it was a good experience. It makes for a fun memory and I got to play the piano for a long time. There was a piano in the room we were screaming from and when people weren’t walking by I was playing. It was good. And I got to talk to my companions and it turned out to be a tender mercy for me. It is a long story that someday I may share, but, for now, suffice it to say that I really believe it was a tender mercy that the we were locked in there. The Lord knows what he is doing and sometimes to help a 20 year-old Elder he may need to lock him in with good companions to provide 7 hours of conversation time. It was agradable.
I am doing well and working hard. I am a good missionary. Despite what I say and how hard I am on myself, I know that the Lord is proud of me. He takes care of me and this is His work.
I am short on time today again. I love you all! Take care!!
Andy
So we had a very fun experience: my companion and I and Elder Ballard and Elder Ahlstrom. We went to district meeting on Tuesday in the chapel in Paso Molino with the whole zone. I had left my scriptures upstairs and went up to get them, and they followed me up because we were all going to go to lunch together. As we came back down the stairs the Elders with the keys had already locked up and left. Now, in any chapel I have seen in the United States, this is a very easy to fix problem. Push. Not here. We didn’t even have an accessible phone!! We laughed at first and then realized that the situation was actually pretty serious. We were locked in with no way out because there are caged doors if we manage to get through the glass. (We are in a rough neighborhood.) And the best part is that nobody was going to be using that chapel for a few days. The soonest someone would be coming in would have been Thursday. So, unless we got some help we were in for the long haul, or until someone realized we were missing and came looking for us. We were stuck inside for 7 hours. We went to a window that faced the street and yelled for help for 7 hours and we were literally and straight-faced ignored by over 100 people. Around 6:30 a man with his daughter was walking by and he would have ignored me too but I finally screamed in disbelief, "are you really going to ignore me, sir? Are you kidding me?!? I have been here for 7 hours!" and he came up to the gate of the chapel and said, "what do you want me to do?" It was really easy once somebody finally stopped to help. He used his cell phone and we were free 20 minutes later.
Anyway, it turns out that it was a good experience. It makes for a fun memory and I got to play the piano for a long time. There was a piano in the room we were screaming from and when people weren’t walking by I was playing. It was good. And I got to talk to my companions and it turned out to be a tender mercy for me. It is a long story that someday I may share, but, for now, suffice it to say that I really believe it was a tender mercy that the we were locked in there. The Lord knows what he is doing and sometimes to help a 20 year-old Elder he may need to lock him in with good companions to provide 7 hours of conversation time. It was agradable.
I am doing well and working hard. I am a good missionary. Despite what I say and how hard I am on myself, I know that the Lord is proud of me. He takes care of me and this is His work.
I am short on time today again. I love you all! Take care!!
Andy
...Then 2 guys came out of nowhere and forced him onto a bus
email dated 10/13/08
An alfajor for anyone who can name that movie.
Rainy weather is unfortunate in Uruguay because nobody goes to church if it is raining. I don’t necessarily blame them; it isn’t like the US where we all have cars. They have to walk or ride moto most of them and if it is raining to them it is a legitimate excuse to skip anything. Oh well. It is ironic because the rainy wet weather is what has officially made October what I have titled a "Dry October." Because our investigators failed to go this weekend, nobody will be able to get baptized in October. November still looks good.
I hope nobody is worried about me from my email from last week. There is no need to be if you are. I am well and I feel good and I know that the Lord is proud of me and helping me to grow. My companion and I are working hard and I am very much in love with the mission right now. My General Conference Resolutions have made a profound impact already in how well I feel and how excited I am to go out and work. It’s a good thing we have General Conference every week.
Okay, are we all ready for me to bajar la caña? Faith Shepherd Kearl has not written me for a LONG time and my rage is kindled against her and her husband. If they will write unto me with full purpose of heart they will be forgiven and they will be my family and I will be their brother.
We have some good families we are teaching, pues they need to get married. I believe they will make it. But I am scared to put too many details because I hate writing about people that I get so excited about and then having something fall apart. My journal is full of those occurrences. Part of the problem is that I am an optimist with everyone. Without exception, of the 30 something investigators Elder Stevenson and I have gone through I have always said, "I think they will get baptized. They are soo good. I think they will make it." And then I write in my journal how excited I am and then...they drop us and I always feel sad.
It must needs be that I go. I love you all very much! Take care and keep praying for me! Prayer is a conversation, ask questions and listen. Bye!!
Andy
An alfajor for anyone who can name that movie.
Rainy weather is unfortunate in Uruguay because nobody goes to church if it is raining. I don’t necessarily blame them; it isn’t like the US where we all have cars. They have to walk or ride moto most of them and if it is raining to them it is a legitimate excuse to skip anything. Oh well. It is ironic because the rainy wet weather is what has officially made October what I have titled a "Dry October." Because our investigators failed to go this weekend, nobody will be able to get baptized in October. November still looks good.
I hope nobody is worried about me from my email from last week. There is no need to be if you are. I am well and I feel good and I know that the Lord is proud of me and helping me to grow. My companion and I are working hard and I am very much in love with the mission right now. My General Conference Resolutions have made a profound impact already in how well I feel and how excited I am to go out and work. It’s a good thing we have General Conference every week.
Okay, are we all ready for me to bajar la caña? Faith Shepherd Kearl has not written me for a LONG time and my rage is kindled against her and her husband. If they will write unto me with full purpose of heart they will be forgiven and they will be my family and I will be their brother.
We have some good families we are teaching, pues they need to get married. I believe they will make it. But I am scared to put too many details because I hate writing about people that I get so excited about and then having something fall apart. My journal is full of those occurrences. Part of the problem is that I am an optimist with everyone. Without exception, of the 30 something investigators Elder Stevenson and I have gone through I have always said, "I think they will get baptized. They are soo good. I think they will make it." And then I write in my journal how excited I am and then...they drop us and I always feel sad.
It must needs be that I go. I love you all very much! Take care and keep praying for me! Prayer is a conversation, ask questions and listen. Bye!!
Andy
Sometimes
email dated 10/06/08
Let it be remembered that I departed to conquer the world the Wednesday after General Conference one year ago. Here I am. Still alive, a little taller, bigger, and more experienced. And I still have plenty of time to go.
I have lately been pondering the purity of my heart. It is and always has been my biggest doubt in the mission field. I have often wondered if I was truly out here for the right reasons. "I figure ya just cant pray a lie" (Huckleberry Finn). I have always been battling with myself deep down trying to decide who I am, not just who people see me as. I know how I am viewed. I am Andy Shepherd. He was a good boy who was obedient to his parents, got impeccable grades, loved to talk, tried to be nice to everyone, loved the Lord and tried to keep himself clean, etc... For the longest time my image from Junior High and High School was that of a really good boy. And I knew it. And I tried to live up to that image. But here is where I ask my defining question that I have pondered my whole mission from time to time. Why? Did I do it because that was my image and I liked it, or did I do it because I loved the Lord and wanted to be what He wanted me to be? I think after a lot of deep analysis of myself, I have come to the conclusion that it had been a little of both, depending at times, if we are discussing Junior High and High School aged Andy Shepherd. There were times that I did good out of the purity of my heart and desire to do good, knowing that it was pleasing in the eyes of God. And I believe there were other times that I did it because I knew that is who I was supposed to be, but perhaps placed too much emphasis on the fact that that is how I knew everyone expected me to be. My battle with pride is not singular, I know we all go through it. And so maybe my discussing this will have some value for some of you.
Now I am a missionary. In the first place, I know that Jesus lives and that He loves us and that His church is on the earth today. That testimony is vital to me. But now I have to break down the day by day Elder Shepherd. When I contact someone in the street, do I do it because I love him or because I know I need to have 70 contacts this week and that I want to find new investigators to baptize, etc... If I do it for either reason I am still doing a good thing, right? But I am terrified of allowing the means to become my end. Obviously, as is always the case with any investigator that we find, I love them. I do. I love the people. And I want them to be happy and to know that Jesus Christ has made possible their eternal progression. I have that right reason going for me. I do love them. But did I only learn to love them because they accepted me and were nice to me and let me come in? Or would I have loved them no matter what?
Jesus Christ loved them no matter what. I have not. I have a LONG way to go. Jesus Christ said, "Forgive them Father, for they know not what they do." Andy Shepherd said, "uggh, stupid 7th day Adventists." There is a horrible and disgusting difference. It makes me ask myself, why do I want them to believe what I believe? Why do I care so much that they believe exactly what I believe? And often, that can be a defining question. It isn’t about ME, or what I believe. I don’t want them to come to understand what I think or what I want or what I believe. I need to want them to come to understand what He wants and what He thinks and what He knows. As an instrument, it is true that my will can become the same as His and so what I say may just be what He would say. But sometimes I fear that I still say what He would say, but I don’t do it right deep down in my heart. The message is still pure, but why am I not? When I focus on them accepting what I said, and I wish I could put italics on the "I", then the purity of the message is lost. First and foremost the reason I say hi to someone in the street should be love.
I want to be a good missionary. I want my family and friends to know that I worked hard and was a good missionary. WHY DO I CARE? That is wrong and it haunts me. I want SOO badly to be a humble servant and to do it for the right reasons. Sometimes I do, and sometimes I don’t. Obviously, you could counsel me that we are all progressing and learning and that is why we are here. That is what the Spirit already told me, too. I guess this email is more of a confession than a cry for help. I am not always 100% obedient. Sometimes I blow it. Sometimes I see someone in the street and I say, "they look grumpy, maybe I will talk to the next person cause I don’t want that person to get annoyed at me." Sometimes I wake up at 6:30 and lay there wishing I could sleep more, and lay there for another 30 minutes. More than sometimes, I would use the word oft-times, my mind isn’t on the mission--rather it is at home. Sometimes I get so mad at the Jehovah’s Witnesses that come up and criticize me in the street. Sometimes I argue. Sometimes my companion and I get out of the house late. And the list goes on and on.
It is such a battle! And I feel so alone in the battle. I give myself credit for wanting to do the mission for the right reasons, and I believe that the Lord may yet give me credit for that desire as well because we learn in Samuel that the Lord looks on the heart. But a desire not carried into action is of very little value. The Sons of Helaman obeyed with exactness. Sometimes I do. And sometimes I don’t.
I know I am a perfectionist and that it can be unhealthy. I want to be better SOO bad. I want to be humble!! I want to be everything perfect! General Conference this weekend was Heaven Sent. It was edifying and just what the doctor ordered. I loved every minute of it. I felt the comforting voice of the spirit. I was counseled. I was given ideas of where to start in the path to improvement. I was filled with love and I almost cried during one talk given by a Seventy about the missionary that had said "I don’t know if God loves me" and the Seventy told him, "yes you do. You do know that." And I echo the words. I know that God loves me. And I know that I can be better. Furthermore, I know that I need to do it step by step. It won’t happen all at once. The key is in my desire. If I work with that desire to be pure, I will be. It won’t happen all at once. It may just be I was learning the virtue of patience.
I believe that I have been learning a lot more than that. I learn SO much all at the same time that sometimes it seems like an overload of information. But as a missionary we don’t have time to think about ourselves too much. The old adage will be remembered: "Lose yourself in the work." If only, if only. Sometimes I am lost in the work, and sometimes I am not.
I promise that I won’t be so self-analytical in future emails. I am at my year mark and trying to figure out what one year of service has done for me. I hope that you all didn’t get too bored with all this. Don’t worry about me. If I had more time I would discuss just exactly and in detail how every talk during conference was valuable to me and that I can and will try to apply so many principles that were re-iterated to me this weekend.
The gospel is true. Jesus lives. Jesus is perfect. We are not. Thank Him for repentance. Thank Him for everything. We are in a beautiful journey called life. Learn from the past and live in the present and plan for the future. And remember that in the end, it will all be alright. It really will be. I don’t want to be a preacher; I just want to be your brother and friend. We all learn together. I thank God more for my family and friends than almost any other blessing. Second only to the Atonement of Jesus Christ. My great joy to associate with all of you is a treasure. Take care of yourselves! I love you!
Andy
Let it be remembered that I departed to conquer the world the Wednesday after General Conference one year ago. Here I am. Still alive, a little taller, bigger, and more experienced. And I still have plenty of time to go.
I have lately been pondering the purity of my heart. It is and always has been my biggest doubt in the mission field. I have often wondered if I was truly out here for the right reasons. "I figure ya just cant pray a lie" (Huckleberry Finn). I have always been battling with myself deep down trying to decide who I am, not just who people see me as. I know how I am viewed. I am Andy Shepherd. He was a good boy who was obedient to his parents, got impeccable grades, loved to talk, tried to be nice to everyone, loved the Lord and tried to keep himself clean, etc... For the longest time my image from Junior High and High School was that of a really good boy. And I knew it. And I tried to live up to that image. But here is where I ask my defining question that I have pondered my whole mission from time to time. Why? Did I do it because that was my image and I liked it, or did I do it because I loved the Lord and wanted to be what He wanted me to be? I think after a lot of deep analysis of myself, I have come to the conclusion that it had been a little of both, depending at times, if we are discussing Junior High and High School aged Andy Shepherd. There were times that I did good out of the purity of my heart and desire to do good, knowing that it was pleasing in the eyes of God. And I believe there were other times that I did it because I knew that is who I was supposed to be, but perhaps placed too much emphasis on the fact that that is how I knew everyone expected me to be. My battle with pride is not singular, I know we all go through it. And so maybe my discussing this will have some value for some of you.
Now I am a missionary. In the first place, I know that Jesus lives and that He loves us and that His church is on the earth today. That testimony is vital to me. But now I have to break down the day by day Elder Shepherd. When I contact someone in the street, do I do it because I love him or because I know I need to have 70 contacts this week and that I want to find new investigators to baptize, etc... If I do it for either reason I am still doing a good thing, right? But I am terrified of allowing the means to become my end. Obviously, as is always the case with any investigator that we find, I love them. I do. I love the people. And I want them to be happy and to know that Jesus Christ has made possible their eternal progression. I have that right reason going for me. I do love them. But did I only learn to love them because they accepted me and were nice to me and let me come in? Or would I have loved them no matter what?
Jesus Christ loved them no matter what. I have not. I have a LONG way to go. Jesus Christ said, "Forgive them Father, for they know not what they do." Andy Shepherd said, "uggh, stupid 7th day Adventists." There is a horrible and disgusting difference. It makes me ask myself, why do I want them to believe what I believe? Why do I care so much that they believe exactly what I believe? And often, that can be a defining question. It isn’t about ME, or what I believe. I don’t want them to come to understand what I think or what I want or what I believe. I need to want them to come to understand what He wants and what He thinks and what He knows. As an instrument, it is true that my will can become the same as His and so what I say may just be what He would say. But sometimes I fear that I still say what He would say, but I don’t do it right deep down in my heart. The message is still pure, but why am I not? When I focus on them accepting what I said, and I wish I could put italics on the "I", then the purity of the message is lost. First and foremost the reason I say hi to someone in the street should be love.
I want to be a good missionary. I want my family and friends to know that I worked hard and was a good missionary. WHY DO I CARE? That is wrong and it haunts me. I want SOO badly to be a humble servant and to do it for the right reasons. Sometimes I do, and sometimes I don’t. Obviously, you could counsel me that we are all progressing and learning and that is why we are here. That is what the Spirit already told me, too. I guess this email is more of a confession than a cry for help. I am not always 100% obedient. Sometimes I blow it. Sometimes I see someone in the street and I say, "they look grumpy, maybe I will talk to the next person cause I don’t want that person to get annoyed at me." Sometimes I wake up at 6:30 and lay there wishing I could sleep more, and lay there for another 30 minutes. More than sometimes, I would use the word oft-times, my mind isn’t on the mission--rather it is at home. Sometimes I get so mad at the Jehovah’s Witnesses that come up and criticize me in the street. Sometimes I argue. Sometimes my companion and I get out of the house late. And the list goes on and on.
It is such a battle! And I feel so alone in the battle. I give myself credit for wanting to do the mission for the right reasons, and I believe that the Lord may yet give me credit for that desire as well because we learn in Samuel that the Lord looks on the heart. But a desire not carried into action is of very little value. The Sons of Helaman obeyed with exactness. Sometimes I do. And sometimes I don’t.
I know I am a perfectionist and that it can be unhealthy. I want to be better SOO bad. I want to be humble!! I want to be everything perfect! General Conference this weekend was Heaven Sent. It was edifying and just what the doctor ordered. I loved every minute of it. I felt the comforting voice of the spirit. I was counseled. I was given ideas of where to start in the path to improvement. I was filled with love and I almost cried during one talk given by a Seventy about the missionary that had said "I don’t know if God loves me" and the Seventy told him, "yes you do. You do know that." And I echo the words. I know that God loves me. And I know that I can be better. Furthermore, I know that I need to do it step by step. It won’t happen all at once. The key is in my desire. If I work with that desire to be pure, I will be. It won’t happen all at once. It may just be I was learning the virtue of patience.
I believe that I have been learning a lot more than that. I learn SO much all at the same time that sometimes it seems like an overload of information. But as a missionary we don’t have time to think about ourselves too much. The old adage will be remembered: "Lose yourself in the work." If only, if only. Sometimes I am lost in the work, and sometimes I am not.
I promise that I won’t be so self-analytical in future emails. I am at my year mark and trying to figure out what one year of service has done for me. I hope that you all didn’t get too bored with all this. Don’t worry about me. If I had more time I would discuss just exactly and in detail how every talk during conference was valuable to me and that I can and will try to apply so many principles that were re-iterated to me this weekend.
The gospel is true. Jesus lives. Jesus is perfect. We are not. Thank Him for repentance. Thank Him for everything. We are in a beautiful journey called life. Learn from the past and live in the present and plan for the future. And remember that in the end, it will all be alright. It really will be. I don’t want to be a preacher; I just want to be your brother and friend. We all learn together. I thank God more for my family and friends than almost any other blessing. Second only to the Atonement of Jesus Christ. My great joy to associate with all of you is a treasure. Take care of yourselves! I love you!
Andy
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
YES!!!
email dated 9/30/08
Woot woot! We baptized 3 people last Friday. Julieta and Maria Rosa, two women who I was skeptical were going to make it because they were both quitting smoking, but they both did it and they are SOO cool. And the 14 year old Federico. They were good baptisms. Federico’s mom came to church for the first time in 30 years and she felt so good that she talked to me and wanted to get a Principles of the Gospel book and wants to come to church every week. And Federico was so excited to be baptized and everything just seemed to work out with him. A LOT of prayer went into that. His mom, when we first started going by, accused us of adding to the bible, the sacred and only bible and that there cant be any more bible, etc... and now she wants to go to church every week and told me she is praying that eventually her whole family will unite with the "Mormon" church.
Julieta was baptized at just the right time. Her 20 year old son overdosed on drugs and almost killed himself the day after her baptism. And rather than viewing at as a evil curse or a bad sign from her baptism like many would have, she said that the gift of the Holy Ghost helped to her overcome the biggest challenge she has ever faced in her life and that reading the Book of Mormon has helped her feel peace in a challenging moment. The gospel can do amazing things when it is applied properly!
Maria Rosa, who smoked 3 packs a day, and always had health problems, pronounced herself cured yesterday when we went by to visit and see how she has been doing. She said "I feel perfect! I don’t hurt at all. My pains are gone." And it may sound crazy, but I believe her. I believe God cured her of her physical pains. Her countenance is SOO different. She looks so different, she was glowing! She had a big huge smile and hugged us as we left. I NEVER break that rule, this being the first time I can remember, but it is a 60 year old woman that is just SOO happy to have changed her life and she thanks us for it and we tell her to thank God. She said she tried quitting smoking so many times, and for some reason when we encouraged her to do it and reminded her to pray to God for help, she found a strength she didn’t know she ever had. She is reading the Book of Mormon every day and SHARING THE GOSPEL WITH HER NEIGHBORS!!! She invited her neighbor to investigate the church because of how happy she is. Very cool!
My favorite thing about the mission is definitely the following: Seeing the changes in people as they allow a faith in Jesus Christ to enter their hearts. I love seeing people happier on account of the gospel, and I love seeing them face their challenges and trials that before were unmanageable, and I love seeing them conquer!
I learned a very valuable lesson from this last month. I am still learning about prayer. I have never prayed so hard. I prayed all month for each of them by name almost all the time. I was always thinking about them as I went to bed and praying for them. I have never been so focused in my whole mission. I have seen as we pray we see results. Like anything, we have to give it our time and attention. If we pray sincerely we can and do and will see the hand of God in our lives. A recent convert family in our ward has a little 5 year old girl that got bit up by a dog last week, to be more specific, by a pit-bull!! And it clasped her face! She was hospitalized. It made me sick to see her. Her face was completely disfigured and the skin ripped off. The ward fasted and prayed for her. She healed faster than I have ever seen anyone heal from anything. That was a few weeks ago, and now she is almost without any marks on her, and it appears that she wont be left with even a scar. The family, with the help of the church members, felt loved and supported through the challenging time and the prayers of the ward healed that little girl. She looked dead, and there was talk of plastic surgery by the doctors, and she healed perfectly!!
What I learned is that God is still a God of miracles. The faith truly does precede the miracles. We all know that it is His will that must be done, but I am starting to see that these challenges that He places before us are all solvable if we remember to seek His will and His way of solving them. God knows what He is doing. He loves us. And His tender mercies are infinite! If we look with the eye of faith rather than the eye of skepticism, we can see and feel the influence of God in our daily lives. It is all a question of point of view. And recognizing that Gods first commandments were reminding us to think of Him and worship only Him, we have to always remember Him. He gives us billions of reminders if we pay attention.
I know there is a God and that He loves us and that He is always listening to the prayer of His children. Let us have faith that he will answer our prayers. If we believe that God doesn’t care about the little things or that he is done with His miracles, then that is what we will see. If we search for His hand with faith and believe He is working miracles, then He will show us the miracles. I have seen them. And I am eternally grateful for this opportunity Heavenly Father gave me to learn this valuable lesson.
Oh yeah, I am staying here in Cerro with Elder Stevenson. I am happy about that. We have some good families we are teaching. I am optimistic that we will see some miracles this transfer.
I love you all so much!! Take care!!
Andy
Woot woot! We baptized 3 people last Friday. Julieta and Maria Rosa, two women who I was skeptical were going to make it because they were both quitting smoking, but they both did it and they are SOO cool. And the 14 year old Federico. They were good baptisms. Federico’s mom came to church for the first time in 30 years and she felt so good that she talked to me and wanted to get a Principles of the Gospel book and wants to come to church every week. And Federico was so excited to be baptized and everything just seemed to work out with him. A LOT of prayer went into that. His mom, when we first started going by, accused us of adding to the bible, the sacred and only bible and that there cant be any more bible, etc... and now she wants to go to church every week and told me she is praying that eventually her whole family will unite with the "Mormon" church.
Julieta was baptized at just the right time. Her 20 year old son overdosed on drugs and almost killed himself the day after her baptism. And rather than viewing at as a evil curse or a bad sign from her baptism like many would have, she said that the gift of the Holy Ghost helped to her overcome the biggest challenge she has ever faced in her life and that reading the Book of Mormon has helped her feel peace in a challenging moment. The gospel can do amazing things when it is applied properly!
Maria Rosa, who smoked 3 packs a day, and always had health problems, pronounced herself cured yesterday when we went by to visit and see how she has been doing. She said "I feel perfect! I don’t hurt at all. My pains are gone." And it may sound crazy, but I believe her. I believe God cured her of her physical pains. Her countenance is SOO different. She looks so different, she was glowing! She had a big huge smile and hugged us as we left. I NEVER break that rule, this being the first time I can remember, but it is a 60 year old woman that is just SOO happy to have changed her life and she thanks us for it and we tell her to thank God. She said she tried quitting smoking so many times, and for some reason when we encouraged her to do it and reminded her to pray to God for help, she found a strength she didn’t know she ever had. She is reading the Book of Mormon every day and SHARING THE GOSPEL WITH HER NEIGHBORS!!! She invited her neighbor to investigate the church because of how happy she is. Very cool!
My favorite thing about the mission is definitely the following: Seeing the changes in people as they allow a faith in Jesus Christ to enter their hearts. I love seeing people happier on account of the gospel, and I love seeing them face their challenges and trials that before were unmanageable, and I love seeing them conquer!
I learned a very valuable lesson from this last month. I am still learning about prayer. I have never prayed so hard. I prayed all month for each of them by name almost all the time. I was always thinking about them as I went to bed and praying for them. I have never been so focused in my whole mission. I have seen as we pray we see results. Like anything, we have to give it our time and attention. If we pray sincerely we can and do and will see the hand of God in our lives. A recent convert family in our ward has a little 5 year old girl that got bit up by a dog last week, to be more specific, by a pit-bull!! And it clasped her face! She was hospitalized. It made me sick to see her. Her face was completely disfigured and the skin ripped off. The ward fasted and prayed for her. She healed faster than I have ever seen anyone heal from anything. That was a few weeks ago, and now she is almost without any marks on her, and it appears that she wont be left with even a scar. The family, with the help of the church members, felt loved and supported through the challenging time and the prayers of the ward healed that little girl. She looked dead, and there was talk of plastic surgery by the doctors, and she healed perfectly!!
What I learned is that God is still a God of miracles. The faith truly does precede the miracles. We all know that it is His will that must be done, but I am starting to see that these challenges that He places before us are all solvable if we remember to seek His will and His way of solving them. God knows what He is doing. He loves us. And His tender mercies are infinite! If we look with the eye of faith rather than the eye of skepticism, we can see and feel the influence of God in our daily lives. It is all a question of point of view. And recognizing that Gods first commandments were reminding us to think of Him and worship only Him, we have to always remember Him. He gives us billions of reminders if we pay attention.
I know there is a God and that He loves us and that He is always listening to the prayer of His children. Let us have faith that he will answer our prayers. If we believe that God doesn’t care about the little things or that he is done with His miracles, then that is what we will see. If we search for His hand with faith and believe He is working miracles, then He will show us the miracles. I have seen them. And I am eternally grateful for this opportunity Heavenly Father gave me to learn this valuable lesson.
Oh yeah, I am staying here in Cerro with Elder Stevenson. I am happy about that. We have some good families we are teaching. I am optimistic that we will see some miracles this transfer.
I love you all so much!! Take care!!
Andy
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
Poco Tiempo
email dated 9/22/08
I don’t have a lot of time because the internet here keeps crashing and my companion needs to go to the bathroom. So allow me, for one second, to make one quick plea.
Be patient with everyone. Love them no matter what. Be kind and meek to those that abuse you and are mean to you and judge you wrongly. What the world needs now is a little compassion for one another. If, for example, the landlord wants you to pay for a broken sink that is not your fault, don’t be rude, rather be meek and try to be a Christian at all times. Don’t be as the companions that are all upset with the landlord for trying to charge us, but try and understand that the problems with the house are probably the fault of 19 year-old boys that don’t take care of things, even if it wasn’t in particular the fault of said companions...So I snuck the landlord some money to help pay the cost of fixing the sink and told her not to blame my church of Jesus Christ for the way she felt abused by us, even though it was truly nobody’s fault. We need compassion and brotherhood. The world tells us everything is a business, but Christ taught us that if your enemy strikes thee on thy cheek, turn him the other also. That doesn’t mean to take everything without defense, but it means to be meek and Christ-like and try to look into the eyes of your enemy and see the brother in him that he is. We are all made in the image of God. If only there were more compassion and cooperation and less business and arguments over money!! But such is the state of humanity. Nobody is perfect, so we often blame our imperfect neighbors and excuse ourselves the opportunity to be perfect, or as Christ would be, because they didn’t treat us as they should have. The gospel is perfect. Men are not. Let us try and be just a little bit nicer to everyone and show them a smile. We are all here in this together after all. It is my plea that we all remember to be patient with those that abuse us and despitefully use us.
I have to go. I love you all so much!! I cannot say how grateful I am to my Lord Jesus Christ for everything He has given me, especially you my family and my friends. The Lord loves us. Christ lives. His church is restored in the earth. His church is for the "perfecting of the saints." We go to learn and grow. I know that Joseph Smith was a prophet, and that the true church is on the earth. Even if there are things I may never understand, I know these things because I have prayed. Let us all continue to prayerfully seek the truth in our lives, remembering humility, patience, and of course CHARITY, the greatest of them all. Take care!!
Andy
I don’t have a lot of time because the internet here keeps crashing and my companion needs to go to the bathroom. So allow me, for one second, to make one quick plea.
Be patient with everyone. Love them no matter what. Be kind and meek to those that abuse you and are mean to you and judge you wrongly. What the world needs now is a little compassion for one another. If, for example, the landlord wants you to pay for a broken sink that is not your fault, don’t be rude, rather be meek and try to be a Christian at all times. Don’t be as the companions that are all upset with the landlord for trying to charge us, but try and understand that the problems with the house are probably the fault of 19 year-old boys that don’t take care of things, even if it wasn’t in particular the fault of said companions...So I snuck the landlord some money to help pay the cost of fixing the sink and told her not to blame my church of Jesus Christ for the way she felt abused by us, even though it was truly nobody’s fault. We need compassion and brotherhood. The world tells us everything is a business, but Christ taught us that if your enemy strikes thee on thy cheek, turn him the other also. That doesn’t mean to take everything without defense, but it means to be meek and Christ-like and try to look into the eyes of your enemy and see the brother in him that he is. We are all made in the image of God. If only there were more compassion and cooperation and less business and arguments over money!! But such is the state of humanity. Nobody is perfect, so we often blame our imperfect neighbors and excuse ourselves the opportunity to be perfect, or as Christ would be, because they didn’t treat us as they should have. The gospel is perfect. Men are not. Let us try and be just a little bit nicer to everyone and show them a smile. We are all here in this together after all. It is my plea that we all remember to be patient with those that abuse us and despitefully use us.
I have to go. I love you all so much!! I cannot say how grateful I am to my Lord Jesus Christ for everything He has given me, especially you my family and my friends. The Lord loves us. Christ lives. His church is restored in the earth. His church is for the "perfecting of the saints." We go to learn and grow. I know that Joseph Smith was a prophet, and that the true church is on the earth. Even if there are things I may never understand, I know these things because I have prayed. Let us all continue to prayerfully seek the truth in our lives, remembering humility, patience, and of course CHARITY, the greatest of them all. Take care!!
Andy
Monday, September 15, 2008
Affinity Lost
email dated 9/15/08
My affinity for the canine is gone. I got bit this week and I was pretty mad. The stupid dog clung to my arm and left me a pretty bruise. If it hadn’t run off, and if I weren’t in the street with Jesus' name on my chest, I would have kicked that dog as hard as I could. I am SO tired of dogs barking all night and running around the streets as menaces attacking missionaries. You really have to come to Uruguay to know what I am talking about. They aren’t like Dogs in the states. There are more dogs than people here, and without a doubt, whatever street your knock there will be incessant barking from multiple canines. I believe that dogs are the biggest hindrance to missionary work in Uruguay that there is.
Okay, now that I got that out...breathe in and out. Take a big deep breath. Hee, Hoo. Okay, I feel all better. My arm is fine. Worry not. Everyone do it, it will make you feel good. Take a big deep breath.
So to make a long story short, the boy who always wanted a dog may have to wait a few years when back home before he wants his own dog. The good news is he will be in college and apartments that allow pets don’t really exist. So I will have plenty of time to re-learn my love for dogs. On the bright side, I do still feel love for cats. I don’t know if I wrote about it, but the other day it was a rainy cold day and my companion and I saved a little kitten and found it a home. It was a cute little kitty.
Last week Elder Aidukaitis of the Quorum of the 70 came and spoke to us all. He had good things to say about faith and when teaching to get to the point of things quickly. I liked a lot of what he said. He did some really good teaching examples and talked about the need for missionaries to keep it simple and get to the point, and he was a really good teacher.
One other new change in our mission is the canceling of siesta observance. The 70 said that the siesta is a wicked tradition and that we are not going to study during the siesta any longer. Before now, our schedule was to do our personal study at 8 and leave the house at 9 and work until lunch, and then be in the house studying between 1 and 3 in the afternoon. Now, all studies will be done in the morning as they are written in preach my gospel and we will leave at 10:30 to attack the day head on. I was skeptical and I was praying for understanding. The Lord answered me quickly. We went out into the street and made some contacts right after the conference and the first few contacts my companion and I made said that it would be best if we stopped by around 1 or 2 in the afternoon. It is common knowledge that the siesta is a religion here. In Artigas last summer a guy once threatened to kill me, and was not kidding, if I ever knocked his door during his afternoon siesta again. I am excited anyway for the schedule change. I like the idea of reading all morning a lot better. And even though we now have technically less proselyting hours now, I feel like we have more hours because there isn’t a huge break in the middle of it. We always wasted so much time walking back to the house and then having to walk back out to the area. I like the idea of following the preach my gospel schedule.
Anyway, the 70 did do me one very good favor. He inspired in me a very strong desire to double my faith and be obedient. I don’t know how he did it because it wasn’t anything in particular that he said, but it was more something that I felt while I was listening to him. I want to change and be stronger-willed and better. I firmly believe that a person can learn a lot about him or herself while running. And I remember as a runner that I had the heart of a lion at the beginning of a race, but that my diligence was always put into doubt in the middle. Oftentimes in my races I gave into my weakness and tiredness and slowed down through the tough middle. That is a HUGE sign of weakness in me. I learned it about myself running. I see it in myself as the alarm goes off at 6:30 and rather than rolling straight out of bed I have to wake myself up for 5 minutes laying there thinking and clinging to my warm covers. I want to train my brain to be so diligent that there is no question. And it is especially meaningful for me now as I am reaching midway in my mission. Will I give in to temptations because I am at that middle phase, or will I push when it is hard to push, and kick when it is hard to kick? I want to be someone strong. And when I come home and run my next marathon, I want the mental training I am doing to myself to show in my time at the finish line. Everyone should count on seeing a new Andy Shepherd in a year. My goal, more than any other goal, is to double my faith.
I pray all is well with everyone. I love you all so much for your support and prayers!! Don’t forget about me because I have been gone so long and that my return is just as far away. This is the age in the mission when all the missionary mail slows and stops coming. It happens to all of us, at least all of my companions. Don’t let it happen to me. Take care!! Love you!!
Andy
My affinity for the canine is gone. I got bit this week and I was pretty mad. The stupid dog clung to my arm and left me a pretty bruise. If it hadn’t run off, and if I weren’t in the street with Jesus' name on my chest, I would have kicked that dog as hard as I could. I am SO tired of dogs barking all night and running around the streets as menaces attacking missionaries. You really have to come to Uruguay to know what I am talking about. They aren’t like Dogs in the states. There are more dogs than people here, and without a doubt, whatever street your knock there will be incessant barking from multiple canines. I believe that dogs are the biggest hindrance to missionary work in Uruguay that there is.
Okay, now that I got that out...breathe in and out. Take a big deep breath. Hee, Hoo. Okay, I feel all better. My arm is fine. Worry not. Everyone do it, it will make you feel good. Take a big deep breath.
So to make a long story short, the boy who always wanted a dog may have to wait a few years when back home before he wants his own dog. The good news is he will be in college and apartments that allow pets don’t really exist. So I will have plenty of time to re-learn my love for dogs. On the bright side, I do still feel love for cats. I don’t know if I wrote about it, but the other day it was a rainy cold day and my companion and I saved a little kitten and found it a home. It was a cute little kitty.
Last week Elder Aidukaitis of the Quorum of the 70 came and spoke to us all. He had good things to say about faith and when teaching to get to the point of things quickly. I liked a lot of what he said. He did some really good teaching examples and talked about the need for missionaries to keep it simple and get to the point, and he was a really good teacher.
One other new change in our mission is the canceling of siesta observance. The 70 said that the siesta is a wicked tradition and that we are not going to study during the siesta any longer. Before now, our schedule was to do our personal study at 8 and leave the house at 9 and work until lunch, and then be in the house studying between 1 and 3 in the afternoon. Now, all studies will be done in the morning as they are written in preach my gospel and we will leave at 10:30 to attack the day head on. I was skeptical and I was praying for understanding. The Lord answered me quickly. We went out into the street and made some contacts right after the conference and the first few contacts my companion and I made said that it would be best if we stopped by around 1 or 2 in the afternoon. It is common knowledge that the siesta is a religion here. In Artigas last summer a guy once threatened to kill me, and was not kidding, if I ever knocked his door during his afternoon siesta again. I am excited anyway for the schedule change. I like the idea of reading all morning a lot better. And even though we now have technically less proselyting hours now, I feel like we have more hours because there isn’t a huge break in the middle of it. We always wasted so much time walking back to the house and then having to walk back out to the area. I like the idea of following the preach my gospel schedule.
Anyway, the 70 did do me one very good favor. He inspired in me a very strong desire to double my faith and be obedient. I don’t know how he did it because it wasn’t anything in particular that he said, but it was more something that I felt while I was listening to him. I want to change and be stronger-willed and better. I firmly believe that a person can learn a lot about him or herself while running. And I remember as a runner that I had the heart of a lion at the beginning of a race, but that my diligence was always put into doubt in the middle. Oftentimes in my races I gave into my weakness and tiredness and slowed down through the tough middle. That is a HUGE sign of weakness in me. I learned it about myself running. I see it in myself as the alarm goes off at 6:30 and rather than rolling straight out of bed I have to wake myself up for 5 minutes laying there thinking and clinging to my warm covers. I want to train my brain to be so diligent that there is no question. And it is especially meaningful for me now as I am reaching midway in my mission. Will I give in to temptations because I am at that middle phase, or will I push when it is hard to push, and kick when it is hard to kick? I want to be someone strong. And when I come home and run my next marathon, I want the mental training I am doing to myself to show in my time at the finish line. Everyone should count on seeing a new Andy Shepherd in a year. My goal, more than any other goal, is to double my faith.
I pray all is well with everyone. I love you all so much for your support and prayers!! Don’t forget about me because I have been gone so long and that my return is just as far away. This is the age in the mission when all the missionary mail slows and stops coming. It happens to all of us, at least all of my companions. Don’t let it happen to me. Take care!! Love you!!
Andy
He Should Not Be Hitting You, Jenny
email dated 9/8/08
So I woke up talking like Forrest Gump today and I couldn’t help it. Enjoy the title and remember the black panther meeting. I think that is an American Classic. Good movie.
So, holy cow!! Shalynn Decker is engaged to Biege Hansen!! Congratulations Shalynn! I think you read the blog page, but if not you wont read me saying "congrats", my mom will have to tell you as she makes your wedding dress. Either way, I am so happy for you. That is so crazy!
It is so weird to think of how fast things are changing. My little brother and older brother are both going to MY university in Logan, and Christian is in high school! I am almost a year old in my mission! Dad is 53!! (Which is still young enough to be in my band by the way.) People I know are getting married! I don’t know if Hannah Merkely is already married, but I was SOO happy when I found out she was marrying Ryan Woolsey. Both of which are such great friends to me. Life is so weird and time just keeps on flying by.
So all is well here in Uruguay. The weather is warmer, although we had a really rainy weekend that put a damper on things. Not a lot of people down here go to church when it is raining. It isn’t like the US where we all have cars. But the important 3 still came, that is the 3 investigators that have baptismal dates for this month.
Maria Rosa, is a 50 year old woman who has gone from smoking 3 packs a day to 6 cigarettes. She has a few more weeks and she wants to be completely stopped so that she can be baptized.
Julieta, 40-ish, quit smoking cold turkey. From half a pack a day to nothing. I am proud of her. It has been a full week and she says every time she feels like smoking she reads the Book of Mormon.
And Federico, our 14 year old boy, has decided that he doesn’t care what anyone thinks. His mom is a member from youth but hasn’t been going to church for 20 years because of her husband. Federico’s brothers and sisters and his dad all said that he shouldn’t go through with it. But he told me yesterday that he wants me to baptize him and he doesn’t care if nobody comes in his whole family because he feels it is what is right for him. He had decided on telling us not to come back anymore, but felt sick about saying that, and then prayed and decided he wanted to continue with us and felt good about it. Very simple prayer answering like we taught him. I am proud of him. We need to soften his dad’s heart. The dad wont prohibit him from being baptized, but he openly says he doesn’t like it.
So those are the 3 we have going on right now. We found a bunch of investigators this last week, my very best finding week in the whole mission. Anyway, the work is progressing. I don’t want to talk about my numbers anymore because I know how not-fun they are to read for you all. Another Elder writes me and always just writes about the numbers and the baptisms, and I know I don’t enjoy that kind of mail so I bet you all don’t enjoy it.
Elder Ballard and I have been playing guitars in our spare time after planning at night, and this morning for P-day, and I have decided that music is saving my life. I don’t remember ever being happier in the whole mission. Playing makes me feel soo good. It makes me want to start a band when I get back to Logan. I think I will. I am already discussing a band name with Ballard. We are writing some fun music, and don’t worry, it is mission appropriate music. We aren’t truchos.
So, I hope everyone is doing just peachy. I am healthier than I was in Tacuarembo and so I feel really good. And my companion is a stud and I love our house of 4. We have a good time together. And we are working hard. The mission has never been better. I think I am finally getting the hang of this whole mission thing.
Take care! I love y'all!!
Andy
So I woke up talking like Forrest Gump today and I couldn’t help it. Enjoy the title and remember the black panther meeting. I think that is an American Classic. Good movie.
So, holy cow!! Shalynn Decker is engaged to Biege Hansen!! Congratulations Shalynn! I think you read the blog page, but if not you wont read me saying "congrats", my mom will have to tell you as she makes your wedding dress. Either way, I am so happy for you. That is so crazy!
It is so weird to think of how fast things are changing. My little brother and older brother are both going to MY university in Logan, and Christian is in high school! I am almost a year old in my mission! Dad is 53!! (Which is still young enough to be in my band by the way.) People I know are getting married! I don’t know if Hannah Merkely is already married, but I was SOO happy when I found out she was marrying Ryan Woolsey. Both of which are such great friends to me. Life is so weird and time just keeps on flying by.
So all is well here in Uruguay. The weather is warmer, although we had a really rainy weekend that put a damper on things. Not a lot of people down here go to church when it is raining. It isn’t like the US where we all have cars. But the important 3 still came, that is the 3 investigators that have baptismal dates for this month.
Maria Rosa, is a 50 year old woman who has gone from smoking 3 packs a day to 6 cigarettes. She has a few more weeks and she wants to be completely stopped so that she can be baptized.
Julieta, 40-ish, quit smoking cold turkey. From half a pack a day to nothing. I am proud of her. It has been a full week and she says every time she feels like smoking she reads the Book of Mormon.
And Federico, our 14 year old boy, has decided that he doesn’t care what anyone thinks. His mom is a member from youth but hasn’t been going to church for 20 years because of her husband. Federico’s brothers and sisters and his dad all said that he shouldn’t go through with it. But he told me yesterday that he wants me to baptize him and he doesn’t care if nobody comes in his whole family because he feels it is what is right for him. He had decided on telling us not to come back anymore, but felt sick about saying that, and then prayed and decided he wanted to continue with us and felt good about it. Very simple prayer answering like we taught him. I am proud of him. We need to soften his dad’s heart. The dad wont prohibit him from being baptized, but he openly says he doesn’t like it.
So those are the 3 we have going on right now. We found a bunch of investigators this last week, my very best finding week in the whole mission. Anyway, the work is progressing. I don’t want to talk about my numbers anymore because I know how not-fun they are to read for you all. Another Elder writes me and always just writes about the numbers and the baptisms, and I know I don’t enjoy that kind of mail so I bet you all don’t enjoy it.
Elder Ballard and I have been playing guitars in our spare time after planning at night, and this morning for P-day, and I have decided that music is saving my life. I don’t remember ever being happier in the whole mission. Playing makes me feel soo good. It makes me want to start a band when I get back to Logan. I think I will. I am already discussing a band name with Ballard. We are writing some fun music, and don’t worry, it is mission appropriate music. We aren’t truchos.
So, I hope everyone is doing just peachy. I am healthier than I was in Tacuarembo and so I feel really good. And my companion is a stud and I love our house of 4. We have a good time together. And we are working hard. The mission has never been better. I think I am finally getting the hang of this whole mission thing.
Take care! I love y'all!!
Andy
Tuesday, September 2, 2008
Myldsmail and the Atheist
Wow, so myldsmail must hate me. I was doing my email 4 hours ago and it kicked me out and had some problems...after I had already written a good long email. It was less than ideal. So now I am back and it is working. We went to go and see an Elder off, who had to go home because a cement wall fell on him last month and broke his pelvis in 4 places. He was a good Elder. It was really sad seeing him. He was SO skinny and sickly looking. We sang him God Be With You and he was gone. And now I am back at the email thing.
So I wrote about how happy our hero was again this week. I think he is still living off of his birthday high. I still got some more birthday mail this week and a package from Ashley. For the second time in my mission she has tried sending me a recorder and for the second time it was robbed. It is indeed tragic. The recorder, as we will all remember from my MTC triumph with Elder Bodily, is an amazing instrument. Our "If You Could Hie To Kolob" Piano and Recorder duo was epic. But I have a feeling now that the birthday has come to an end and I am now just a regular 20 year old boy...man.
So I have a story that I fear will be a novel. We will see how it comes out. It is another Andy Shepherd experience.
This week I have been placing a huge emphasis on my faith and really going for an absolute "knowledge" of the existence of God. Don’t ask me why, I usually am not on that theme but this week I was. In my personal studies I was searching out scriptures on the theme, for example Alma 30 where Alma talks about how everything denotes there is a God. Etc... And I have daily been listening to a Jessie Clark Funk song called "Everything Speaks His Name". (Jessie Clark Funk is my guilty pleasure music in the mission. She is an EFY singer more or less and as such is approved. She has a style that reminds me of Carrie Underwood and so it is fun...I like it. Don’t make fun of me.) Anyway, and the song talks about that theme. I have had it stuck in my head. I have been praying every night for an experience that will strengthen my faith and understanding of why I am here. Not doubting, just asking for more faith. Still with me. Good. The point up 'til now is that I made a real emphasis in my studies and prayers on just the existence of God.
Elder Stevenson and I were in a ward blitz in another area in the city last Saturday morning. We were knocking, because that is what you do in blitzes because you don’t know anyone or anything. We came across a 25 year old man walking with a 1 year old baby, rather teaching his kid to walk on the sidewalk. I saw him and thought "FAMILY", which is a missionary target, and we went in. He told us he was atheist and that he didn’t really have interest in talking to us. I said "well, we just want to chat, we go around getting to know people and talking about what we do and believe, can we come by some other time?" And he said "just come by now." That was weird, so we followed him home down the street and went in and talked to him.
Before I continue, I have never had this kind of a connection before with ANY investigator or person in the Guay (Gwy as we say it). He told me about his life story and the reason he is atheist. He was born in the ghetto of ghettos here in Uruguay, was mixed up in drugs and gangs and stealing during his teenage years, and somehow overcame all that "without God" and now he has a house, a beautiful wife and a baby boy and steady work. He has it all. I was so impressed with him. He was SOO nice and very sincere, very open. He reminded me of me because he just opened up and started rambling on like I always do to other people. We were instantly friends. The difference being our philosophies on life.
He proceeded to tell me the very common atheist theme, "if God existed there wouldn’t be so much suffering in the world." Now here is where this story gets me, I had been studying and preparing myself all week for this visit without knowing it. I realize now that all that studying was for me, it wasn’t even for him. I didn’t share one scripture with him that I had read, or anything of that kind. But I felt a sympathy and an empathy that I normally wouldn’t have had for him. I related to him. It was interesting. Anyway, moving on. So he tells us his way of thinking and I told him mine. We talked for an hour. The spirit spoke to me in a way that is rare for me and I responded to my feelings. I told him a story that I don’t know if I have told many of you before, but the spirit prompted me to share a story about 10 year old Andy Shepherd. I originally thought "he wont care about a story from my childhood, he needs something more recent more substantial..." but I couldn’t deny how I felt. So I told him this.
When I was in the 4th or 5th grade I had decided, for a time, that God didn’t exist. I had learned about dinosaurs in school, and my logical mind had decided that they didn’t work well with the story of Genesis I learned in primary. I said to myself, even at that age (believe me or not but that is the kind of sweet cute boy I was), "God doesn’t exist. Science has proven that." I told myself I have to keep going to church because I don’t want to hurt my parents feelings, but when I grow up I will stop going to church. I really told myself this stuff!! I was a logical little boy. I then told him also about how I decided to start praying because there was a song called A Child's Prayer that made me cry and I didn’t know why. At that age I offered my first personal prayer that I can remember all by myself in my room on the bottom bunk. The prayer went something like this "God, if you exist then you hear me. If you don’t I am just talking to myself and so this doesn’t really mean anything." I prayed like this for a while. It became a daily thing praying. I don’t know at what moment I began taking out the phrase "if you exist" and I don’t know when I started believing. I only know that I began to feel and know that God existed.
Now, as I told that story it answered my prayers. I hadn’t thought of that story in a while, but it is one of the early foundations of my faith. We talked about the plan, and how we cant say that God doesn’t exist because of suffering. I said we need to understand our purpose for being here. Etc.. You all know all of this so we will move on. He responded to it a little bit. He even started coming to the conclusion that my beliefs were beautiful because I believed in an eternal life, and a just god. He was obsessed with the theme justice. He said if there was a God He would be just. As we explained the plan he saw that we believed in justice. And that in our beliefs those that suffer at least have something going for them, whereas in his beliefs they suffered, died, and that sucked. He saw how beautiful a hope and faith in God can be. And he invited us back. And promised me he would start praying the same way little boy Andy Shepherd prayed. And he wants us to play football with him. I really wish he was in my area. We had to turn him over to the other Elders. Anyway, I have never seen a receptive Atheist, especially one that has been through what he went through. The experience wasn’t only for him. I felt something completely new to me.
I knew that I needed to be there in that area on Saturday morning. As I looked my new friend in the eyes I felt that I knew him for some reason. I felt like I was exactly where I needed to be. A sensation I never felt before came over me. I am typically not a person to say the whole "there are no coincidences" phrase, because I usually think God lets things roll off our agency, but Saturday morning was not a coincidence. I cannot deny what I felt with that man. I had a connection with him that I have never felt before with any other human being. I was supposed to be here in Uruguay, in this ward, and on those divisions, to talk to him on Saturday morning. I cant describe it. Mock my feelings if you will, but I felt something miraculous that has strengthened my faith. My faith is strengthened, and an atheist is talking to God, even if he does feel "stupid doing it".
I know that God exists. I know that Jesus Christ lives. And I know that God is fair and loving and that we can all be with Him again someday. I love you all and I have to go. Take care of yourselves!!
Andy
So I wrote about how happy our hero was again this week. I think he is still living off of his birthday high. I still got some more birthday mail this week and a package from Ashley. For the second time in my mission she has tried sending me a recorder and for the second time it was robbed. It is indeed tragic. The recorder, as we will all remember from my MTC triumph with Elder Bodily, is an amazing instrument. Our "If You Could Hie To Kolob" Piano and Recorder duo was epic. But I have a feeling now that the birthday has come to an end and I am now just a regular 20 year old boy...man.
So I have a story that I fear will be a novel. We will see how it comes out. It is another Andy Shepherd experience.
This week I have been placing a huge emphasis on my faith and really going for an absolute "knowledge" of the existence of God. Don’t ask me why, I usually am not on that theme but this week I was. In my personal studies I was searching out scriptures on the theme, for example Alma 30 where Alma talks about how everything denotes there is a God. Etc... And I have daily been listening to a Jessie Clark Funk song called "Everything Speaks His Name". (Jessie Clark Funk is my guilty pleasure music in the mission. She is an EFY singer more or less and as such is approved. She has a style that reminds me of Carrie Underwood and so it is fun...I like it. Don’t make fun of me.) Anyway, and the song talks about that theme. I have had it stuck in my head. I have been praying every night for an experience that will strengthen my faith and understanding of why I am here. Not doubting, just asking for more faith. Still with me. Good. The point up 'til now is that I made a real emphasis in my studies and prayers on just the existence of God.
Elder Stevenson and I were in a ward blitz in another area in the city last Saturday morning. We were knocking, because that is what you do in blitzes because you don’t know anyone or anything. We came across a 25 year old man walking with a 1 year old baby, rather teaching his kid to walk on the sidewalk. I saw him and thought "FAMILY", which is a missionary target, and we went in. He told us he was atheist and that he didn’t really have interest in talking to us. I said "well, we just want to chat, we go around getting to know people and talking about what we do and believe, can we come by some other time?" And he said "just come by now." That was weird, so we followed him home down the street and went in and talked to him.
Before I continue, I have never had this kind of a connection before with ANY investigator or person in the Guay (Gwy as we say it). He told me about his life story and the reason he is atheist. He was born in the ghetto of ghettos here in Uruguay, was mixed up in drugs and gangs and stealing during his teenage years, and somehow overcame all that "without God" and now he has a house, a beautiful wife and a baby boy and steady work. He has it all. I was so impressed with him. He was SOO nice and very sincere, very open. He reminded me of me because he just opened up and started rambling on like I always do to other people. We were instantly friends. The difference being our philosophies on life.
He proceeded to tell me the very common atheist theme, "if God existed there wouldn’t be so much suffering in the world." Now here is where this story gets me, I had been studying and preparing myself all week for this visit without knowing it. I realize now that all that studying was for me, it wasn’t even for him. I didn’t share one scripture with him that I had read, or anything of that kind. But I felt a sympathy and an empathy that I normally wouldn’t have had for him. I related to him. It was interesting. Anyway, moving on. So he tells us his way of thinking and I told him mine. We talked for an hour. The spirit spoke to me in a way that is rare for me and I responded to my feelings. I told him a story that I don’t know if I have told many of you before, but the spirit prompted me to share a story about 10 year old Andy Shepherd. I originally thought "he wont care about a story from my childhood, he needs something more recent more substantial..." but I couldn’t deny how I felt. So I told him this.
When I was in the 4th or 5th grade I had decided, for a time, that God didn’t exist. I had learned about dinosaurs in school, and my logical mind had decided that they didn’t work well with the story of Genesis I learned in primary. I said to myself, even at that age (believe me or not but that is the kind of sweet cute boy I was), "God doesn’t exist. Science has proven that." I told myself I have to keep going to church because I don’t want to hurt my parents feelings, but when I grow up I will stop going to church. I really told myself this stuff!! I was a logical little boy. I then told him also about how I decided to start praying because there was a song called A Child's Prayer that made me cry and I didn’t know why. At that age I offered my first personal prayer that I can remember all by myself in my room on the bottom bunk. The prayer went something like this "God, if you exist then you hear me. If you don’t I am just talking to myself and so this doesn’t really mean anything." I prayed like this for a while. It became a daily thing praying. I don’t know at what moment I began taking out the phrase "if you exist" and I don’t know when I started believing. I only know that I began to feel and know that God existed.
Now, as I told that story it answered my prayers. I hadn’t thought of that story in a while, but it is one of the early foundations of my faith. We talked about the plan, and how we cant say that God doesn’t exist because of suffering. I said we need to understand our purpose for being here. Etc.. You all know all of this so we will move on. He responded to it a little bit. He even started coming to the conclusion that my beliefs were beautiful because I believed in an eternal life, and a just god. He was obsessed with the theme justice. He said if there was a God He would be just. As we explained the plan he saw that we believed in justice. And that in our beliefs those that suffer at least have something going for them, whereas in his beliefs they suffered, died, and that sucked. He saw how beautiful a hope and faith in God can be. And he invited us back. And promised me he would start praying the same way little boy Andy Shepherd prayed. And he wants us to play football with him. I really wish he was in my area. We had to turn him over to the other Elders. Anyway, I have never seen a receptive Atheist, especially one that has been through what he went through. The experience wasn’t only for him. I felt something completely new to me.
I knew that I needed to be there in that area on Saturday morning. As I looked my new friend in the eyes I felt that I knew him for some reason. I felt like I was exactly where I needed to be. A sensation I never felt before came over me. I am typically not a person to say the whole "there are no coincidences" phrase, because I usually think God lets things roll off our agency, but Saturday morning was not a coincidence. I cannot deny what I felt with that man. I had a connection with him that I have never felt before with any other human being. I was supposed to be here in Uruguay, in this ward, and on those divisions, to talk to him on Saturday morning. I cant describe it. Mock my feelings if you will, but I felt something miraculous that has strengthened my faith. My faith is strengthened, and an atheist is talking to God, even if he does feel "stupid doing it".
I know that God exists. I know that Jesus Christ lives. And I know that God is fair and loving and that we can all be with Him again someday. I love you all and I have to go. Take care of yourselves!!
Andy
One Happy Elder
I think I could be the happiest I remember ever being in my whole mission. I just feel really good today. There are many factors, I believe. Allow me to share.
I had a SWEET birthday. On Thursday I got 2 packages, just in time for me to open the next day on my birthday. I was very happy for the new CDs, the blankets, the letters, the pics of nieces and nephews, Teddy’s adorable letter, CANNED CHEESE and RITZ!!!, a scarf, a really AWESOME P-day jacket, etc... It was a happy birthday indeed. And I gotta hand it to Shalynn Decker, she is smart at wrapping a package. I imagine she didn’t want it to get robbed and so it was wrapped by tin foil, wrapping paper, followed by a black garbage bag. Any thief would have given up by the time he reached the tin foil. My companion Elder Stevenson bought 5 meters of pizza for the 4 of us in the house to share and Elder Ballard and Elder Holloway bought me a cake. It was a happy birthday.
So the birthday was good, but I am also very excited about the new house and companions. We all get along just swimmingly and we will have a good time together. But I must say the house just makes all the difference now! We have a piano in the house!!!!!! The lady we rent it from just left the piano in there. And Elder Ballard is a really good guitar player and so we jammed for a few hours this morning, wrote a few songs, etc... It felt SO good to play music. That definitely is a factor for how good I feel. Music is a very wholesome P-day activity.
I got really good emails today from family, and it is SO cool to hear that Logan has some Shepherds there again. It makes me so happy to hear that everyone is doing well.
The weather is warming up. 'Nuf said.
I am happy.
The new area is pretty different. It is BIG and the people are very different. I am going to have to refine my street approach because you only have 3 seconds before they are done with you. We don’t have a lot of investigators, but we will change that soon, and I am excited about our ward. It is a really good ward. In church yesterday there were good classes, Sacrament Meeting was very edifying, and the ward is already in love with me because I played my very awesome arrangement of Joseph Smith’s First Prayer. Many lunch invitations followed. This seems to be a strong ward. I am excited to work with them.
We did a lot of knocking and street contacting this week, because we don’t have a lot going on, and we found a few people. We will see how they progress.
Life is good. I am the happiest I have ever been on the mission. I am feeling into the groove of things, I feel decently fluent in the language, it is fun feeling cool this week because I am senior companion (even though that doesn’t really mean anything), and I love all of you for all your prayers and all you do for me! I have to go. Out of time. Love you all!!
Andy
I had a SWEET birthday. On Thursday I got 2 packages, just in time for me to open the next day on my birthday. I was very happy for the new CDs, the blankets, the letters, the pics of nieces and nephews, Teddy’s adorable letter, CANNED CHEESE and RITZ!!!, a scarf, a really AWESOME P-day jacket, etc... It was a happy birthday indeed. And I gotta hand it to Shalynn Decker, she is smart at wrapping a package. I imagine she didn’t want it to get robbed and so it was wrapped by tin foil, wrapping paper, followed by a black garbage bag. Any thief would have given up by the time he reached the tin foil. My companion Elder Stevenson bought 5 meters of pizza for the 4 of us in the house to share and Elder Ballard and Elder Holloway bought me a cake. It was a happy birthday.
So the birthday was good, but I am also very excited about the new house and companions. We all get along just swimmingly and we will have a good time together. But I must say the house just makes all the difference now! We have a piano in the house!!!!!! The lady we rent it from just left the piano in there. And Elder Ballard is a really good guitar player and so we jammed for a few hours this morning, wrote a few songs, etc... It felt SO good to play music. That definitely is a factor for how good I feel. Music is a very wholesome P-day activity.
I got really good emails today from family, and it is SO cool to hear that Logan has some Shepherds there again. It makes me so happy to hear that everyone is doing well.
The weather is warming up. 'Nuf said.
I am happy.
The new area is pretty different. It is BIG and the people are very different. I am going to have to refine my street approach because you only have 3 seconds before they are done with you. We don’t have a lot of investigators, but we will change that soon, and I am excited about our ward. It is a really good ward. In church yesterday there were good classes, Sacrament Meeting was very edifying, and the ward is already in love with me because I played my very awesome arrangement of Joseph Smith’s First Prayer. Many lunch invitations followed. This seems to be a strong ward. I am excited to work with them.
We did a lot of knocking and street contacting this week, because we don’t have a lot going on, and we found a few people. We will see how they progress.
Life is good. I am the happiest I have ever been on the mission. I am feeling into the groove of things, I feel decently fluent in the language, it is fun feeling cool this week because I am senior companion (even though that doesn’t really mean anything), and I love all of you for all your prayers and all you do for me! I have to go. Out of time. Love you all!!
Andy
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
Cerro
Transfers are in...and my companion and I are both leaving. He is going to the offices and I am going to a place called Cerro, which is down in Montevideo more or less. I don’t really know much about it. It is hard that we are both leaving; this is the second time that has happened to me, but I know the missionary who is coming in. He is a guy named Elder Hansen and there aren’t better missionaries in the world. He is one of the most sincere, obedient, and hard working guys I have ever met. It won’t surprise me when he is in the Quorum of the 12 someday. He is training in my area. I feel good leaving him our investigators. It is sad to leave when it felt like we were getting things together, but I did want to go so I am not complaining. He and his greenie are spoiled. We left them some of the best investigators I have seen my whole mission, including a family we found last week that is AMAZING. The 14 year old and 10 year old boy even participate in the lessons!! It is truly a whole family with mom and dad and brothers and sister. They are so nice! The mom cried when we said we were leaving, but also promised to keep reading and praying and of course to go to church this Sunday.
On the flipside of things, in Cerro I will be with one Elder Stevenson. He has been out a few months less than I have and they say he is really strong. He supposedly can bench 300 pounds or something like that, so I will be safe even though I am in the city. I am also excited for the opportunity to lose a few pounds, I hope. The missionaries don’t eat with members every day down there. Furthermore, I am excited because I hear I am going to be in a house of 4 missionaries. I have never done that before, but I think I will like it. A lot of missionaries say it sucks to be in a house with 4, sharing the bathroom and all that, but I think I won’t mind. I am kind of excited. You get to meet and get to know more people that way. It is a new adventure.
I feel content. I honestly feel I can tell myself that I gave Tacuarembo the best I could. I feel like with Elder Surtees and Elder Oliphant that we made a difference here. We did leave it better than we found it.
There isn’t much great to tell. I don’t have any funny stories today, nor any political rants, nor any funny jokes. I am tired. I packed this morning, and I HATE packing, and I still have to run around and say a few more goodbyes today.
Pray for me. I know God will hear you. He always hears me. But pray and remember that it makes a difference. Just because God knows everything already does not take the responsibility off of us nor the necessity to speak to Him with full purpose of heart. He knows our heart. It says in the scriptures more times than I know, "ask and ye shall receive." Understand and know that when you pray for me I feel it. I feel it when you don’t. There are some blessings God is waiting to give us if we remember to ask. "This is life eternal" to know God the Eternal Father, and His son whom He sent (John 17:3). If we want to get to know Him we have to be on frequent communication. I am praying for you and, as often as memory permits, by name. There are a lot of people to remember, but I do my best. I never really understood what MJ, my cuñado, was saying about falling asleep on your knees and being so tired, but now that I am out here as a missionary I get it. I have lost count of the times I have fallen asleep on my knees. I finally made a deal with God, because my knees hurt, that I would end the official prayer and get into bed and then keep talking to Him until I fell asleep. It is working out fine. He is always listening and it isn’t a joke. You need to converse with Him and He will give you rest.
I wish you all the best. I love you!
Andy
On the flipside of things, in Cerro I will be with one Elder Stevenson. He has been out a few months less than I have and they say he is really strong. He supposedly can bench 300 pounds or something like that, so I will be safe even though I am in the city. I am also excited for the opportunity to lose a few pounds, I hope. The missionaries don’t eat with members every day down there. Furthermore, I am excited because I hear I am going to be in a house of 4 missionaries. I have never done that before, but I think I will like it. A lot of missionaries say it sucks to be in a house with 4, sharing the bathroom and all that, but I think I won’t mind. I am kind of excited. You get to meet and get to know more people that way. It is a new adventure.
I feel content. I honestly feel I can tell myself that I gave Tacuarembo the best I could. I feel like with Elder Surtees and Elder Oliphant that we made a difference here. We did leave it better than we found it.
There isn’t much great to tell. I don’t have any funny stories today, nor any political rants, nor any funny jokes. I am tired. I packed this morning, and I HATE packing, and I still have to run around and say a few more goodbyes today.
Pray for me. I know God will hear you. He always hears me. But pray and remember that it makes a difference. Just because God knows everything already does not take the responsibility off of us nor the necessity to speak to Him with full purpose of heart. He knows our heart. It says in the scriptures more times than I know, "ask and ye shall receive." Understand and know that when you pray for me I feel it. I feel it when you don’t. There are some blessings God is waiting to give us if we remember to ask. "This is life eternal" to know God the Eternal Father, and His son whom He sent (John 17:3). If we want to get to know Him we have to be on frequent communication. I am praying for you and, as often as memory permits, by name. There are a lot of people to remember, but I do my best. I never really understood what MJ, my cuñado, was saying about falling asleep on your knees and being so tired, but now that I am out here as a missionary I get it. I have lost count of the times I have fallen asleep on my knees. I finally made a deal with God, because my knees hurt, that I would end the official prayer and get into bed and then keep talking to Him until I fell asleep. It is working out fine. He is always listening and it isn’t a joke. You need to converse with Him and He will give you rest.
I wish you all the best. I love you!
Andy
Saturday, August 16, 2008
Really Clever Title
So I am running out of ideas for really clever titles. At least today I can't think of anything and I don’t want to waste 2 minutes thinking about it.
Our hero continues preaching the gospel and suffering from Gastritis. He needs a transfer because this ward feeds him too much and doesn’t understand that he doesn’t want a Thanksgiving Feast with dessert every day for lunch, rather he just needs to strengthen and nourish his body. But our hero cannot offend anyone. It is a rule in Latin America that if you refuse a second plate it is because you hated the first and missionaries can’t afford to send that message to anyone. This is the first time in my mission I have openly stated a preference of what I want to happen with transfers. I need out of here. And for only one reason: my health. I feel sick! Everyday I dread eating. What makes it harder is that we have to return to the house after lunch for our studies. Here in Uruguay there is Siesta and so what would be morning studies in a normal mission are in the afternoon here. The problem is after eating lunch I want to die and studying is an impossibility as my intestines are turned upside down. And then I still have to work the rest of the afternoon. I am convinced that if I am transferred somewhere where I can choose what and when I eat I will be a lot better off. My studies are slacking and my health is slipping. One more week in Tacuarembo! Let us cross our fingers.
Having said that, I do love this area. The members are great and a missionary with a stronger stomach would do well here. I am still doing well despite the health. We are still finding and teaching, and we have a few people with baptismal dates, etc... The work continues. I try to avoid writing too many details about all the people because if I did my emails would be pretty dull for y'all. We currently do have some really nice investigators. If you want to hear about them, ask me in 2 years and we will read my handwritten journal which has a more full account of the people we are teaching.
Lately I have been really recognizing the importance of the family in society. It is no joke. The Proclamation to the World that the First Presidency sent out in 1995 is a very powerful document that I am coming to appreciate. They warn us that if we do not protect the family institution that all the calamities and disasters foretold by the prophets will come upon us. I believe that. Let me explain.
Uruguay is not the strongest country in the world, economically or politically. My heart aches for a people who I see in desperate need. This last week, there was a night we were walking home and we saw a guy crash on his bike. His 5-7 year old son was following on a smaller bike. We ran up to help and discovered the man to be the definition of inebriated, absolutely plastered, drunk! We helped him to his feet and he started spouting off some stuff about "Good Old Joseph Smith" and stumbling all around. The cute little boy went and put the chain on his dad’s bike back on track and said, "I put the chain on for you. Let’s go home." And then the little kid eagerly remounted his own little bicycle and awaited his father. The man was still spouting off random stuff about Joe Smith and the Gold Bible and I really wanted to take that kid and adopt him that minute. The drunk fell back down because he couldn’t even stand up straight! I couldn’t help but cry a little. My companion whispered some encouraging words to the kid while I told the drunk he needed to get his act together and helped him to his bike. I think that was the saddest thing I have ever seen in my life: That poor little kid following his stumbling father in the dark.
The tragedy of a story like that, and many other experiences I have had here, is that it is not just one time. But as literally as that little boy was falling his "stumbling father in the dark" it is as spiritually applicable. I tire of seeing the kids here follow the examples of their parents. But it is a psychological reality. Children very often become like their parents. We studied it in psychology and it is more than a good correlation. Take me for example. What do I want to do? I want to get my doctorate someday and teach in the meanwhile until I can someday be a professor. Who is my father? A teacher who got his doctorate who currently does work as a professor. Look at my brothers! There isn’t a single one that doesn’t talk about the possibility of wanting to be a teacher! College grads raise kids who want to be college grads. We learn from our parents. We often follow their example, because it is something with which we are familiar. Ahora, let’s try to count how many families I know in this ward and my last that have both mother and father. I can count them on 2 hands!!! Now let’s count how many pregnant 14-20 year old girls with no boy in sight I know of EVEN inside the church. In just 2 mission areas the number is in the 20´s.
One thing that breaks my heart about this country is seeing the youth not live up to its potential. In a country with education completely free, including university studies, how many students even graduate from their high school education? The last statistic I heard was around 1 in 5!! And I see it too. I am with these people every day. And then these drop outs live off of their socialist government welfare and pass the tradition on to their children, who in most cases are following in a pattern of a low standard of living, dropping out of school as well because everyone else is doing it and their parents are no example, and the cycle goes on and on. What is the remedy? What is the only solution? And now we arrive at the point of all of this, including the reason I am here as a missionary. The Gospel of Jesus Christ is the answer.
People that live the gospel, understand the principles, do what the church teaches us to do, are the people that will finish their studies, that try to have a good job so that they can provide for a family, a family with father and mother who serve as equal partners in raising children that will hopefully set similar goals for their futures. Of course it isn’t easy or perfect. And I am not so naive as to think that everybody who keeps the commandments and tries living the gospel has an enchanted life with a perfect family. I know that it isn’t easy or perfect, that there are casualties on all sides, even in families that are trying to be centered in the gospel, but I would guess that those that are living gospel standards are seeing better results. I am beginning to recognize the importance of having a family based on Gospel Principles. Or at least even a family based on any principles.
I love the people here SO much!!! I want so badly for them to make their lives better. Whenever I teach a young person the lessons, I always apply it to their young lives and tell them they need to graduate from school. Sometimes I care as much that they graduate from school as I care if they get baptized. I testify that the gospel of Jesus Christ blesses families. That the Gospel is the answer. If a society neglects the importance of the family, the economy is worsened, the education is worsened, the politics get dirty and full of empty promises, and the people suffer. I have always heard these things my whole life, but never experienced them for myself because I lived a sheltered life in West Jordan Utah and these problems didn’t exist to me. Now that I see them every day I understand. The Gospel of Jesus Christ is the answer for our spiritual salvation, but, even on a temporal level, we need to live gospel standards or our societies will struggle. I am not suggesting forcing people to do anything--on a political level I state no opinion right now--but as a missionary I say very boldly that I will teach this message until I die if it means I can help some families change their lives and find, if only in their own homes, heaven.
I love you all. Sorry about preaching to you all. You know I am opinionated and a man of many words. I hope you take special notice of the word "man," because this month I turn 20 and I have decided I am officially a man. Someone needs to watch the Man From Snowy River for me and tell me all the requirements of manhood so that I can ensure I have arrived. Take care! I love you!!
Andy
Our hero continues preaching the gospel and suffering from Gastritis. He needs a transfer because this ward feeds him too much and doesn’t understand that he doesn’t want a Thanksgiving Feast with dessert every day for lunch, rather he just needs to strengthen and nourish his body. But our hero cannot offend anyone. It is a rule in Latin America that if you refuse a second plate it is because you hated the first and missionaries can’t afford to send that message to anyone. This is the first time in my mission I have openly stated a preference of what I want to happen with transfers. I need out of here. And for only one reason: my health. I feel sick! Everyday I dread eating. What makes it harder is that we have to return to the house after lunch for our studies. Here in Uruguay there is Siesta and so what would be morning studies in a normal mission are in the afternoon here. The problem is after eating lunch I want to die and studying is an impossibility as my intestines are turned upside down. And then I still have to work the rest of the afternoon. I am convinced that if I am transferred somewhere where I can choose what and when I eat I will be a lot better off. My studies are slacking and my health is slipping. One more week in Tacuarembo! Let us cross our fingers.
Having said that, I do love this area. The members are great and a missionary with a stronger stomach would do well here. I am still doing well despite the health. We are still finding and teaching, and we have a few people with baptismal dates, etc... The work continues. I try to avoid writing too many details about all the people because if I did my emails would be pretty dull for y'all. We currently do have some really nice investigators. If you want to hear about them, ask me in 2 years and we will read my handwritten journal which has a more full account of the people we are teaching.
Lately I have been really recognizing the importance of the family in society. It is no joke. The Proclamation to the World that the First Presidency sent out in 1995 is a very powerful document that I am coming to appreciate. They warn us that if we do not protect the family institution that all the calamities and disasters foretold by the prophets will come upon us. I believe that. Let me explain.
Uruguay is not the strongest country in the world, economically or politically. My heart aches for a people who I see in desperate need. This last week, there was a night we were walking home and we saw a guy crash on his bike. His 5-7 year old son was following on a smaller bike. We ran up to help and discovered the man to be the definition of inebriated, absolutely plastered, drunk! We helped him to his feet and he started spouting off some stuff about "Good Old Joseph Smith" and stumbling all around. The cute little boy went and put the chain on his dad’s bike back on track and said, "I put the chain on for you. Let’s go home." And then the little kid eagerly remounted his own little bicycle and awaited his father. The man was still spouting off random stuff about Joe Smith and the Gold Bible and I really wanted to take that kid and adopt him that minute. The drunk fell back down because he couldn’t even stand up straight! I couldn’t help but cry a little. My companion whispered some encouraging words to the kid while I told the drunk he needed to get his act together and helped him to his bike. I think that was the saddest thing I have ever seen in my life: That poor little kid following his stumbling father in the dark.
The tragedy of a story like that, and many other experiences I have had here, is that it is not just one time. But as literally as that little boy was falling his "stumbling father in the dark" it is as spiritually applicable. I tire of seeing the kids here follow the examples of their parents. But it is a psychological reality. Children very often become like their parents. We studied it in psychology and it is more than a good correlation. Take me for example. What do I want to do? I want to get my doctorate someday and teach in the meanwhile until I can someday be a professor. Who is my father? A teacher who got his doctorate who currently does work as a professor. Look at my brothers! There isn’t a single one that doesn’t talk about the possibility of wanting to be a teacher! College grads raise kids who want to be college grads. We learn from our parents. We often follow their example, because it is something with which we are familiar. Ahora, let’s try to count how many families I know in this ward and my last that have both mother and father. I can count them on 2 hands!!! Now let’s count how many pregnant 14-20 year old girls with no boy in sight I know of EVEN inside the church. In just 2 mission areas the number is in the 20´s.
One thing that breaks my heart about this country is seeing the youth not live up to its potential. In a country with education completely free, including university studies, how many students even graduate from their high school education? The last statistic I heard was around 1 in 5!! And I see it too. I am with these people every day. And then these drop outs live off of their socialist government welfare and pass the tradition on to their children, who in most cases are following in a pattern of a low standard of living, dropping out of school as well because everyone else is doing it and their parents are no example, and the cycle goes on and on. What is the remedy? What is the only solution? And now we arrive at the point of all of this, including the reason I am here as a missionary. The Gospel of Jesus Christ is the answer.
People that live the gospel, understand the principles, do what the church teaches us to do, are the people that will finish their studies, that try to have a good job so that they can provide for a family, a family with father and mother who serve as equal partners in raising children that will hopefully set similar goals for their futures. Of course it isn’t easy or perfect. And I am not so naive as to think that everybody who keeps the commandments and tries living the gospel has an enchanted life with a perfect family. I know that it isn’t easy or perfect, that there are casualties on all sides, even in families that are trying to be centered in the gospel, but I would guess that those that are living gospel standards are seeing better results. I am beginning to recognize the importance of having a family based on Gospel Principles. Or at least even a family based on any principles.
I love the people here SO much!!! I want so badly for them to make their lives better. Whenever I teach a young person the lessons, I always apply it to their young lives and tell them they need to graduate from school. Sometimes I care as much that they graduate from school as I care if they get baptized. I testify that the gospel of Jesus Christ blesses families. That the Gospel is the answer. If a society neglects the importance of the family, the economy is worsened, the education is worsened, the politics get dirty and full of empty promises, and the people suffer. I have always heard these things my whole life, but never experienced them for myself because I lived a sheltered life in West Jordan Utah and these problems didn’t exist to me. Now that I see them every day I understand. The Gospel of Jesus Christ is the answer for our spiritual salvation, but, even on a temporal level, we need to live gospel standards or our societies will struggle. I am not suggesting forcing people to do anything--on a political level I state no opinion right now--but as a missionary I say very boldly that I will teach this message until I die if it means I can help some families change their lives and find, if only in their own homes, heaven.
I love you all. Sorry about preaching to you all. You know I am opinionated and a man of many words. I hope you take special notice of the word "man," because this month I turn 20 and I have decided I am officially a man. Someone needs to watch the Man From Snowy River for me and tell me all the requirements of manhood so that I can ensure I have arrived. Take care! I love you!!
Andy
Monday, August 4, 2008
There was a time I loved dogs
All the movies always depict the pound as this scary evil place that snatches up the dogs. I am very grateful to be from the United States where we have a pound. I have been trying to count how many dogs more or less "live" on my street. I have counted up past 40 and I am done counting. There are more. This dog lover is starting to lose his patience. Last night at 3 in the morning they decided to have a concert. I tried counting the different barks there were. There were over 15. But counting dog barks is not like counting sheep; it does not help you sleep at all. I found myself fantasizing that if I only had a gun... I am sure a good few weeks in the states and I will love dogs again, but I am kind of sick of them to be honest.
There isn’t much to tell. We gave a 14 year old girl that has been going to church with her friend for 5 months a baptismal date. We are dropping the investigators that failed to go to church 3 weeks in a row. We are on the hunt.
One thing that makes me sad is that SO many missionaries, upon being rejected, take the attitude: "well, I gave them their chance. Too bad for them. My hands are clean of their blood." And I understand that thought process; I am not free of it at times. Paul in the New Testament was that way when he taught the Jews. "My hands are clean of your blood! I am going now to the gentiles!" My only problem with it is it sometimes seems very uncharitable. I want nothing to do with any type of thought process that doesn’t show love for my fellow men. It is hard when you teach someone, and you know they feel it, and you know they believe it, but they are just too lazy to change their lives. It hurts because we want SOO bad that they can make their lives better through the church and through faith in Jesus Christ. In my interviews with the president I mentioned, "I am fine, it makes me sad sometimes when people hate us before we even talk to them..." And what he said to me was, "The Savior said ‘They Hated Me before they hated you’." I was thinking about that, and that advice does me no good. I don’t want them to hate Him, my Savior. That actually makes me sadder than them hating me. I am really placing an emphasis this week on remembering charity. I found myself as we dropped some investigators thinking, "they will regret that someday." I didn’t like it. That isn’t me. So I have taken to reading Corinthians 13 every morning.
Anyway, I hope everyone is doing well. I gotta go. Take care and remember to love them that hate you and do good to them that despitefully use you, etc... I love you all!!
Andy
There isn’t much to tell. We gave a 14 year old girl that has been going to church with her friend for 5 months a baptismal date. We are dropping the investigators that failed to go to church 3 weeks in a row. We are on the hunt.
One thing that makes me sad is that SO many missionaries, upon being rejected, take the attitude: "well, I gave them their chance. Too bad for them. My hands are clean of their blood." And I understand that thought process; I am not free of it at times. Paul in the New Testament was that way when he taught the Jews. "My hands are clean of your blood! I am going now to the gentiles!" My only problem with it is it sometimes seems very uncharitable. I want nothing to do with any type of thought process that doesn’t show love for my fellow men. It is hard when you teach someone, and you know they feel it, and you know they believe it, but they are just too lazy to change their lives. It hurts because we want SOO bad that they can make their lives better through the church and through faith in Jesus Christ. In my interviews with the president I mentioned, "I am fine, it makes me sad sometimes when people hate us before we even talk to them..." And what he said to me was, "The Savior said ‘They Hated Me before they hated you’." I was thinking about that, and that advice does me no good. I don’t want them to hate Him, my Savior. That actually makes me sadder than them hating me. I am really placing an emphasis this week on remembering charity. I found myself as we dropped some investigators thinking, "they will regret that someday." I didn’t like it. That isn’t me. So I have taken to reading Corinthians 13 every morning.
Anyway, I hope everyone is doing well. I gotta go. Take care and remember to love them that hate you and do good to them that despitefully use you, etc... I love you all!!
Andy
Saturday, August 2, 2008
Can Soap Be Dirty?
So I was taking my shower the other day—and one quick fun fact about Uruguay is that the bathrooms are horrible and I will show you all pictures someday. So the toilet and the shower are basically in the same spot in our bathroom. Most bathrooms here are only 3 feet by 3 feet, so the toilet and the TP always get soaked every time one showers. Anyway, so the inevitable finally happened. My whole mission I have known at some point I would accidentally drop my soap in the toilet. It happened. I stood there in the slow drips of my shower, (we shower in drips because we only have 3 minutes of hot water, but if you do it in slower drips you can have 6 minutes of hot drips), and I just stood there looking at my wonderful strawberry scented soap bar sitting in the toilet bowl. It was a very tough moment for me. I thought about it: Can soap be dirty? If I reach in and pull it out I can still use it right? Soap is pure cleanliness. I could scrape off a layer I guess and still use it, but it is pretty small already... And, after a minute of thinking about it, I decided I didn’t need to be cheap or super desperate and I just opened a new bar of soap. But I still ask the question, can soap be dirty?
So we had a baptism on Saturday of one Noelia Melina Nuñez Benitez, a 10 year old girl who is smarter than I was when I was 16. We have been working with the family and activating the family for a few months. I didn’t want to push it. And finally they asked us if she could be baptized. It is always good when they ask, and she asked for herself. We didn’t even have to challenge her. I really like doing it that way sometimes. Anyway, she is SO amazing. I love this family so much. They are such a good family. The dad has always been going, but the mom no. The mom is coming back and the dad comes every week with his daughter. They are SO cool. The dad Freddy is a super stud and served a mission back in the 90s here in Uruguay. Anyway, it was the best baptismal service I have been a part of here in Uruguay. The whole extended family came, and there were musical numbers; there were a lot of people that came to support her. Anyway, I was gonna say why she is so smart. She asks really profound questions that most at that age would never think of. "Why did Jesus have to suffer so much if so many were still going to reject him in the end?", "How does God answer a prayer no? I have prayed to know if the Book of Mormon is true and I felt the good feelings of the spirit so I know that it is true and was answered yes, but how does God say no?" etc... She is very sensitive to the spirit. When we started teaching her it was because she had said "Today in church I felt something really good inside. I just didn’t want to leave." After she said that her dad explained the Holy Ghost and the teaching began and 2 weeks later she was baptized.
I normally am not too excited for teaching little kids, but I daresay she was one of the best investigators I have had my whole mission. And I really think she will stay faithful in the church. She has been working on her mom. She is 10!! But she has been saying "mom, I want you to say prayers with us as a family every night", because she had recognized her mom would never actually say the prayer she would only listen. She will stay faithful. She already has friends asking her at school why she was going to the Mormon church and she just simply told them she believed and invited them to come to her baptism and some actually came. She is an amazing little girl.
We have some other possible baptisms coming up, and some really good investigators. The theme is getting them to go to church. It isn’t part of the Uruguay culture to get up on Sunday and do anything for 3 hours, unless that 3 hour activity is sitting home and drinking Mate. It is really hard to find people that are willing to go to church. I tend to give investigators 2 weeks of teaching without going to church as a maximum, and if they don’t go after that I just want to drop them. It is rare that I want to visit someone into a third week if they haven’t gone to church yet. We are looking for the elect and the elect will be willing to walk a few blocks to church on Sunday mornings.
So one last story para terminar: we clapped a door the other day (because clapping is what you do here, you rarely knock on someone’s door). It was a door already open and I saw the lady sitting at a table in her chair. We made eye contact. I don’t know who she thought she was kidding. She all the sudden drops to the floor under the table. We can still see her. She begins crawling across the floor to the other room and we watch her push aside the curtain of a door that separated that front room from the other room. She crawled out of sight and the curtain closed. ... ... I just can’t believe we are that pesado to some people that they can’t even come say "no thanks." It was comical.
I hope everyone is well and that you are all behaving and keeping the commandments. Take care!! Love you all!!
Andy
So we had a baptism on Saturday of one Noelia Melina Nuñez Benitez, a 10 year old girl who is smarter than I was when I was 16. We have been working with the family and activating the family for a few months. I didn’t want to push it. And finally they asked us if she could be baptized. It is always good when they ask, and she asked for herself. We didn’t even have to challenge her. I really like doing it that way sometimes. Anyway, she is SO amazing. I love this family so much. They are such a good family. The dad has always been going, but the mom no. The mom is coming back and the dad comes every week with his daughter. They are SO cool. The dad Freddy is a super stud and served a mission back in the 90s here in Uruguay. Anyway, it was the best baptismal service I have been a part of here in Uruguay. The whole extended family came, and there were musical numbers; there were a lot of people that came to support her. Anyway, I was gonna say why she is so smart. She asks really profound questions that most at that age would never think of. "Why did Jesus have to suffer so much if so many were still going to reject him in the end?", "How does God answer a prayer no? I have prayed to know if the Book of Mormon is true and I felt the good feelings of the spirit so I know that it is true and was answered yes, but how does God say no?" etc... She is very sensitive to the spirit. When we started teaching her it was because she had said "Today in church I felt something really good inside. I just didn’t want to leave." After she said that her dad explained the Holy Ghost and the teaching began and 2 weeks later she was baptized.
I normally am not too excited for teaching little kids, but I daresay she was one of the best investigators I have had my whole mission. And I really think she will stay faithful in the church. She has been working on her mom. She is 10!! But she has been saying "mom, I want you to say prayers with us as a family every night", because she had recognized her mom would never actually say the prayer she would only listen. She will stay faithful. She already has friends asking her at school why she was going to the Mormon church and she just simply told them she believed and invited them to come to her baptism and some actually came. She is an amazing little girl.
We have some other possible baptisms coming up, and some really good investigators. The theme is getting them to go to church. It isn’t part of the Uruguay culture to get up on Sunday and do anything for 3 hours, unless that 3 hour activity is sitting home and drinking Mate. It is really hard to find people that are willing to go to church. I tend to give investigators 2 weeks of teaching without going to church as a maximum, and if they don’t go after that I just want to drop them. It is rare that I want to visit someone into a third week if they haven’t gone to church yet. We are looking for the elect and the elect will be willing to walk a few blocks to church on Sunday mornings.
So one last story para terminar: we clapped a door the other day (because clapping is what you do here, you rarely knock on someone’s door). It was a door already open and I saw the lady sitting at a table in her chair. We made eye contact. I don’t know who she thought she was kidding. She all the sudden drops to the floor under the table. We can still see her. She begins crawling across the floor to the other room and we watch her push aside the curtain of a door that separated that front room from the other room. She crawled out of sight and the curtain closed. ... ... I just can’t believe we are that pesado to some people that they can’t even come say "no thanks." It was comical.
I hope everyone is well and that you are all behaving and keeping the commandments. Take care!! Love you all!!
Andy
Monday, July 21, 2008
The King of the Geeks
Another week gone by...I wonder which week it is. Somewhere in the 30s has to be. That means I only have somewhere in the 70s of weeks left on the mission. WHOA! Don’t let me get trunky, but I only have 15 months left...I love joking with my companion and reminding him "I ONLY HAVE 15 MONTHS LEFT!!!" and I joke with all the members too. Some people think I am serious and say "Elder, you can’t be thinking like that. The time passes so fast; you gotta stay focused...blah blah blah." Most, however, take it for what it really is and that is the nerdy joking that always can be found when Andy Shepherd is around.
So this last week was nothing really new, at least not anything that would be interesting to write about. One recent development in my life is that I have realized that I think Elder Oliphant could be my favorite companion of the whole mission so far. He is the first companion I have stayed with for longer than 6 weeks. I am getting really used to him. At first he was really shy, but he is starting to come out of his shell a little bit. I feel somewhat guilty. He has started joking like me and saying the things I always say to the people. For example, with a lot of members I will joke about how much time I have left, or I will say "You may pretend to be sick of me right now and wish I would get transferred, but when this linda cara—pretty face—is gone you will wish that Elder Shepherd were back." I feel guilty because he is starting to act like me, which means he is starting to be a super geeky nerd-bomber. But at least we are having fun. Mostly, I appreciate his humble example. I think President sent me a companion to teach me a thing or two. He has a humble way about him. He just gets up at the alarm at 6:30 without moaning and he walks straight to the bathroom to take his shower and etc... He doesn’t say a word, just goes about his business. He is a good missionary. I am really glad to still be with him here in Tacuarembo.
So we are teaching some people, we are also looking for new people, we are also visiting old people... that is what we are doing. Any questions?
So yesterday we went by one of our investigators who happens to live in an almacen-house, which means he sells stuff from his house. Anyway, he had gone fishing and he always asks me when we are going to go fishing with him. This last week he went fishing and caught two decent 14 inchers. He put them in a plastic bag and gifted them to us. I was trying to figure out how I want to fry the things and his wife suggested we just put them in the microwave because that would be easier...I don’t know about that. My companion and I are going to cook them today. It was a funny gift.
We ran into a drunk yesterday, which reminds me of my new joke! Como se dice "borracho" en jápones?...Yositomo Wis-qui-sito! HAHAHA!!!! I think it is so funny. Do you want another? Here you go: Como se dice papel higenico en jápones?...Kita Kakita! HAHA! Oh, I kill myself. That "kita Kakita" one had me laughing for 20 minutes the first time I read it. I seriously was crying laughing the first time I read it. There is a little girl in the ward who I was always asking to teach me jokes who gave me a joke book. Do you get it? Kita Kakita? It is like Quitar Kaka... and it sounds like a fun Japanese name... Okay, so I have turned into one of those lame people who enjoys laffy taffy style jokes. But I gotta have something to keep me going. One more joke:
"Doctor, yo veo elefantes azules por todas partes."
"Ha visto ya a un sicólogo?"
"No, solo elefantes azules."
Ummm, I will stop with the Spanish jokes. I am sure Matt at least appreciates the Japanese ones. Hopefully you all can appreciate the last one, it isn’t too hard to translate, and you don’t need to know Spanish because it isn’t a play on words.
I am trying to decide what I want to study now. I think I just may decide to read that Old Testament again. On the mission now I have read the Book of Mormon twice in English, and once in Spanish, and the Doctrine and Covenants in English and the Pearl of Great Price in Spanish and English, the New Testament in both languages, All of the mission library books 2 times INCLUDING Jesus the Christ which is a massive book...Solo me falta el antiguo testamento. I am not sure if I am in the mood to read the Old Testament, but it may just be necessary. What I really wish was that the mission library were bigger. Us fast readers who use all their spare time to read end up reading everything too many times. I know why the mission library is so small. They want us to focus on the canonical scriptures...I understand. I just wish I had something new to read some days.
So now that I have bored you all with my reading résumé from the mission, I hope that you all can appreciate why it is so necessary that I tell lame laffy taffy jokes.
I am doing just peachy. I hope that you are all doing well! Remember that God loves us, every last one of us. Pray to Him and He will give you rest. I love you all!!
Andy
So this last week was nothing really new, at least not anything that would be interesting to write about. One recent development in my life is that I have realized that I think Elder Oliphant could be my favorite companion of the whole mission so far. He is the first companion I have stayed with for longer than 6 weeks. I am getting really used to him. At first he was really shy, but he is starting to come out of his shell a little bit. I feel somewhat guilty. He has started joking like me and saying the things I always say to the people. For example, with a lot of members I will joke about how much time I have left, or I will say "You may pretend to be sick of me right now and wish I would get transferred, but when this linda cara—pretty face—is gone you will wish that Elder Shepherd were back." I feel guilty because he is starting to act like me, which means he is starting to be a super geeky nerd-bomber. But at least we are having fun. Mostly, I appreciate his humble example. I think President sent me a companion to teach me a thing or two. He has a humble way about him. He just gets up at the alarm at 6:30 without moaning and he walks straight to the bathroom to take his shower and etc... He doesn’t say a word, just goes about his business. He is a good missionary. I am really glad to still be with him here in Tacuarembo.
So we are teaching some people, we are also looking for new people, we are also visiting old people... that is what we are doing. Any questions?
So yesterday we went by one of our investigators who happens to live in an almacen-house, which means he sells stuff from his house. Anyway, he had gone fishing and he always asks me when we are going to go fishing with him. This last week he went fishing and caught two decent 14 inchers. He put them in a plastic bag and gifted them to us. I was trying to figure out how I want to fry the things and his wife suggested we just put them in the microwave because that would be easier...I don’t know about that. My companion and I are going to cook them today. It was a funny gift.
We ran into a drunk yesterday, which reminds me of my new joke! Como se dice "borracho" en jápones?...Yositomo Wis-qui-sito! HAHAHA!!!! I think it is so funny. Do you want another? Here you go: Como se dice papel higenico en jápones?...Kita Kakita! HAHA! Oh, I kill myself. That "kita Kakita" one had me laughing for 20 minutes the first time I read it. I seriously was crying laughing the first time I read it. There is a little girl in the ward who I was always asking to teach me jokes who gave me a joke book. Do you get it? Kita Kakita? It is like Quitar Kaka... and it sounds like a fun Japanese name... Okay, so I have turned into one of those lame people who enjoys laffy taffy style jokes. But I gotta have something to keep me going. One more joke:
"Doctor, yo veo elefantes azules por todas partes."
"Ha visto ya a un sicólogo?"
"No, solo elefantes azules."
Ummm, I will stop with the Spanish jokes. I am sure Matt at least appreciates the Japanese ones. Hopefully you all can appreciate the last one, it isn’t too hard to translate, and you don’t need to know Spanish because it isn’t a play on words.
I am trying to decide what I want to study now. I think I just may decide to read that Old Testament again. On the mission now I have read the Book of Mormon twice in English, and once in Spanish, and the Doctrine and Covenants in English and the Pearl of Great Price in Spanish and English, the New Testament in both languages, All of the mission library books 2 times INCLUDING Jesus the Christ which is a massive book...Solo me falta el antiguo testamento. I am not sure if I am in the mood to read the Old Testament, but it may just be necessary. What I really wish was that the mission library were bigger. Us fast readers who use all their spare time to read end up reading everything too many times. I know why the mission library is so small. They want us to focus on the canonical scriptures...I understand. I just wish I had something new to read some days.
So now that I have bored you all with my reading résumé from the mission, I hope that you all can appreciate why it is so necessary that I tell lame laffy taffy jokes.
I am doing just peachy. I hope that you are all doing well! Remember that God loves us, every last one of us. Pray to Him and He will give you rest. I love you all!!
Andy
Friday, July 18, 2008
Amazing Grace How Sweet The Sound
No I am just kidding. I would never write an email that lame. There are actually plenty of good stories from this week if you all want to hear. Whadda ya say?
So I was feeling extra spiritual this week and I was really looking for the hand of God in my life. One thing I have recently been coming to realize is that my prayers, for quite some time, had been lacking. I had the sad logic in my head, and I am embarrassed to admit it, that God already knows everything. So he knows everything I can say thanks for and everything I want Him to help me with. So I would still say my "gracias por eso" and "bendiceme con eso", but it was very short and very...more or less, as the Spaniard puts it.
Well, I woke up last week. I finally came to. I began to realize that I had stopped noticing the hand of God in my missionary work and if you aren’t with God, or you aren’t giving Him the credit as a missionary, the work becomes very dull and even more difficult. I encourage everyone who doesn’t feel as close to God as they would like, and so that means everyone I am assuming, to pray out loud. I have taken to praying out loud at any opportunity I can. If my companion goes to the bathroom for 3 minutes, I begin talking out loud to Him. It has been helping me A TON! For a while I forgot that He is my best friend. I promise you that if you pray, as the scriptures say "with real intent", you feel the love of God pouring down on your shoulders. For me, I am ADD, so that means praying out loud to make sure I am paying real attention and am sincere. For you it may just mean a stronger effort. But say your prayers! Talk to Him as if He were right in front of you, as if He were your best friend and you were talking to Him about anything. Jesus Christ wasn’t kidding when he exhorted us to pray. Nor were any of the prophets. "But ask with faith, doubting nothing."(James 1:6) I felt peace from heaven this week. I testify that God is always listening. I testify that the pride cycle is deadly. When we forget to pray to God with real intent, He will humble us. If we ignore Him, we will get lost and feel alone. Pray!! It works. I teach it to people every day. It is so sad that this primary answer still has me on my heels sometimes.
So in my spiritual high, I have been feeling a lot more guided. This story is weird to me, but I will share it anyway. We were walking the other morning and all of our appointments fell through in no time flat. We were headed for a house that we had knocked that had said we could come back "cualquier otro momento" "any other time"...whatever. Side note, I have taken to telling the people, "Everybody tells us to come back any other time. Do you actually want us to come to back? Will you let us come in for a few minutes to share a message when we come back?" ... it isn’t yielding results because everybody still says "Sí, cualquier otro momento." UGH! Anyway, so we are heading for a house that had said we could come back. We pass an intersection and I look over to the right on the intersecting street and hundreds of yards away I see a lady walking with a baby. I immediately felt impressed to go talk to her. I told myself "no way, it is way out of the way." and we continued walking in our direction. I felt it again. To my mind came the story of young Bishop Thomas S. Monson and a story about him learning to follow the spirit better. He had made a promise NEVER to ignore a spiritual prompting. Recognizing that the Spirit was talking to me I said "Elder, lets go talk to that lady I saw back there." His response was "what lady?" We went back to the intersection and she still was walking. So we begin moseying along, pretending like we actually had intended to be on that street, and after a long walk, she was WAY far away, we approached her and said good morning, told her who we were, had some casual morning "nice day for July" talk, etc... She was SUPER nice...and she said she wasn’t interested.
I was SO frustrated in that moment. I said to myself "I know the spirit told me to talk to you. There is no way you are rejecting us!" But she did. And now we were on a completely different street way far from where we wanted to be. We just kind of stood there puzzled. I think my companion had expected that to work out better too. Wanting to feel like I was in control, I said without thinking "Let’s knock this house right here while we are here." So we knocked the house that we happened to be right in front of. We actually clapped our hands from her gate, that is how you knock here. So she opens her window in her door and begins to give us the same old "oh, it is all the same God. You boys are doing a good thing. I already know all about it..." but while she was talking my mind was drawn to Preach My Gospel. I had just recently read about saying quick, powerful truths to catch attention and invite the spirit. I would typically have just said "we want to share a message about Jesus Christ, or the family, or etc..." But this time I said very boldly, "So you know that we believe that right now, this very moment, there is a prophet of God on the Earth who receives revelation and guides us as did the original apostles of the Church of Jesus Christ?" It was a good sentence, if I do say so myself. To make a long story short, she was stunned. She stopped her little routine "get lost" and asked rather inquisitively "excuse me? What did you say you believe?" Moving towards her window, not wanting to talk from 10 feet away I said "let me show you." To make a long story short we taught her the first lesson and she was AMAZED to find that we had the same Bible. She was intrigued from the get go. It was a message she had never heard, although she had been telling us off "oh it is all the same God. I already know what you believe..." Preach My Gospel works. That whole getting to the point strategy works. I am gonna do that a lot more often. We have an invite to go back and she is super nice and maybe she will go somewhere if Satan doesn’t place more complacent "oh it is all good" feelings into her heart.
The miracle is that we never would have knocked just that house and we weren’t planning on knocking that street we were on any time soon. It is kind of an ugly street and we have a lot more streets that are still higher priority knocks even now.
Anyway, that is one story, but I think stories tend to be on the boring side when you are a missionary. It was really dragged out. I used to be a creative writer, but when you are writing a true story and you want to fit in a bunch of boring details it makes for a long drawn out story.
I have been thinking a lot about Grace this week. We are SO often criticized for not putting enough emphasis on grace. As Mormons, we are accused of trying to "work our way into heaven". The truth of the matter is that it "is by grace that we are saved, after all we can do." (2 Nephi 25:23) We were sharing the Plan of Salvation with someone and they told us we didn’t talk enough about grace. I found myself asking, "what greater grace can there be?" The message of the Restoration enhances our understanding of grace to ASTRONOMICAL levels!! What greater exhibition of grace could there be than that of a Father who offers to his completely unworthy children the oppurtunity to progress and become like Him? The issue is that progression requires action. Our opportunity to "act" is an act of grace from God. He is offering us the opportunity to find ourselves on a much higher plane and is willing to take us there after our best effort, even when we don’t necessarily deserve it. Anyone that says Mormons don’t understand grace are uninformed of the Mormon Doctrine.
So I have a billion things I could say, but this email is getting pretty long. I hope that everyone is doing just peachy! I am happy. I am trying to work hard. I will write more stories and insights from the mind of Andy Shepherd next week. Until then, be good! Love you all!
Andy
So I was feeling extra spiritual this week and I was really looking for the hand of God in my life. One thing I have recently been coming to realize is that my prayers, for quite some time, had been lacking. I had the sad logic in my head, and I am embarrassed to admit it, that God already knows everything. So he knows everything I can say thanks for and everything I want Him to help me with. So I would still say my "gracias por eso" and "bendiceme con eso", but it was very short and very...more or less, as the Spaniard puts it.
Well, I woke up last week. I finally came to. I began to realize that I had stopped noticing the hand of God in my missionary work and if you aren’t with God, or you aren’t giving Him the credit as a missionary, the work becomes very dull and even more difficult. I encourage everyone who doesn’t feel as close to God as they would like, and so that means everyone I am assuming, to pray out loud. I have taken to praying out loud at any opportunity I can. If my companion goes to the bathroom for 3 minutes, I begin talking out loud to Him. It has been helping me A TON! For a while I forgot that He is my best friend. I promise you that if you pray, as the scriptures say "with real intent", you feel the love of God pouring down on your shoulders. For me, I am ADD, so that means praying out loud to make sure I am paying real attention and am sincere. For you it may just mean a stronger effort. But say your prayers! Talk to Him as if He were right in front of you, as if He were your best friend and you were talking to Him about anything. Jesus Christ wasn’t kidding when he exhorted us to pray. Nor were any of the prophets. "But ask with faith, doubting nothing."(James 1:6) I felt peace from heaven this week. I testify that God is always listening. I testify that the pride cycle is deadly. When we forget to pray to God with real intent, He will humble us. If we ignore Him, we will get lost and feel alone. Pray!! It works. I teach it to people every day. It is so sad that this primary answer still has me on my heels sometimes.
So in my spiritual high, I have been feeling a lot more guided. This story is weird to me, but I will share it anyway. We were walking the other morning and all of our appointments fell through in no time flat. We were headed for a house that we had knocked that had said we could come back "cualquier otro momento" "any other time"...whatever. Side note, I have taken to telling the people, "Everybody tells us to come back any other time. Do you actually want us to come to back? Will you let us come in for a few minutes to share a message when we come back?" ... it isn’t yielding results because everybody still says "Sí, cualquier otro momento." UGH! Anyway, so we are heading for a house that had said we could come back. We pass an intersection and I look over to the right on the intersecting street and hundreds of yards away I see a lady walking with a baby. I immediately felt impressed to go talk to her. I told myself "no way, it is way out of the way." and we continued walking in our direction. I felt it again. To my mind came the story of young Bishop Thomas S. Monson and a story about him learning to follow the spirit better. He had made a promise NEVER to ignore a spiritual prompting. Recognizing that the Spirit was talking to me I said "Elder, lets go talk to that lady I saw back there." His response was "what lady?" We went back to the intersection and she still was walking. So we begin moseying along, pretending like we actually had intended to be on that street, and after a long walk, she was WAY far away, we approached her and said good morning, told her who we were, had some casual morning "nice day for July" talk, etc... She was SUPER nice...and she said she wasn’t interested.
I was SO frustrated in that moment. I said to myself "I know the spirit told me to talk to you. There is no way you are rejecting us!" But she did. And now we were on a completely different street way far from where we wanted to be. We just kind of stood there puzzled. I think my companion had expected that to work out better too. Wanting to feel like I was in control, I said without thinking "Let’s knock this house right here while we are here." So we knocked the house that we happened to be right in front of. We actually clapped our hands from her gate, that is how you knock here. So she opens her window in her door and begins to give us the same old "oh, it is all the same God. You boys are doing a good thing. I already know all about it..." but while she was talking my mind was drawn to Preach My Gospel. I had just recently read about saying quick, powerful truths to catch attention and invite the spirit. I would typically have just said "we want to share a message about Jesus Christ, or the family, or etc..." But this time I said very boldly, "So you know that we believe that right now, this very moment, there is a prophet of God on the Earth who receives revelation and guides us as did the original apostles of the Church of Jesus Christ?" It was a good sentence, if I do say so myself. To make a long story short, she was stunned. She stopped her little routine "get lost" and asked rather inquisitively "excuse me? What did you say you believe?" Moving towards her window, not wanting to talk from 10 feet away I said "let me show you." To make a long story short we taught her the first lesson and she was AMAZED to find that we had the same Bible. She was intrigued from the get go. It was a message she had never heard, although she had been telling us off "oh it is all the same God. I already know what you believe..." Preach My Gospel works. That whole getting to the point strategy works. I am gonna do that a lot more often. We have an invite to go back and she is super nice and maybe she will go somewhere if Satan doesn’t place more complacent "oh it is all good" feelings into her heart.
The miracle is that we never would have knocked just that house and we weren’t planning on knocking that street we were on any time soon. It is kind of an ugly street and we have a lot more streets that are still higher priority knocks even now.
Anyway, that is one story, but I think stories tend to be on the boring side when you are a missionary. It was really dragged out. I used to be a creative writer, but when you are writing a true story and you want to fit in a bunch of boring details it makes for a long drawn out story.
I have been thinking a lot about Grace this week. We are SO often criticized for not putting enough emphasis on grace. As Mormons, we are accused of trying to "work our way into heaven". The truth of the matter is that it "is by grace that we are saved, after all we can do." (2 Nephi 25:23) We were sharing the Plan of Salvation with someone and they told us we didn’t talk enough about grace. I found myself asking, "what greater grace can there be?" The message of the Restoration enhances our understanding of grace to ASTRONOMICAL levels!! What greater exhibition of grace could there be than that of a Father who offers to his completely unworthy children the oppurtunity to progress and become like Him? The issue is that progression requires action. Our opportunity to "act" is an act of grace from God. He is offering us the opportunity to find ourselves on a much higher plane and is willing to take us there after our best effort, even when we don’t necessarily deserve it. Anyone that says Mormons don’t understand grace are uninformed of the Mormon Doctrine.
So I have a billion things I could say, but this email is getting pretty long. I hope that everyone is doing just peachy! I am happy. I am trying to work hard. I will write more stories and insights from the mind of Andy Shepherd next week. Until then, be good! Love you all!
Andy
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