On the up and up‏

email dated 3-31-08
Sorry I didn't write the group email last week. I wasn't in a good mood and I was afraid I would end up complaining about my companion. That was the last thing I wanted to do in an email to everybody. But I am delighted to report that I am on the up and up.

I am happier than I have ever been my entire mission! I really got it together this week. I am really having fun with it now . We have good investigators, and some really good ones with baptismal dates for April, although I am bummed because I might get transferred and I won't get to see them be baptized, but I still played a part in it either way. Oh yeah, it is really hard for me to put my thoughts together so I will write this email in story form.

Elder Fernandez was driving me crazy. When he started here he made me mad on the very first day of the month when he informed me that he had no money. I had to pay for everything this month. EVERYTHING! I even paid for food for him, and it came out of my own pocket eventually because two missionaries living off of one missionary's asignación is impossible. So I let that get to me. But I let more get to me. His Dear John was sad and I tried to be sensitive and understanding, but I just couldn't be sensitive enough. The way he would intimidate and offend my ward and my investigators that Elder Davies and I found before he got here really bothered me. He has this very Deep Doctrine style of teaching. He tries teaching the meat before the milk. We would be teaching someone who doesn't know if they believe in God and he will decide to teach Priesthood Authority and use his knowledge of the Bible Dictionary and a mountain of Scriptures from the Bible to prove why Authority is necessary. The worst was when he read scriptures that I didn't even know what they meant and then he would ask "what does this mean?" and then he will look at them and wait. And if they don't answer after 30 seconds of silence he will say, "fine, I will explain it to you..." And then I will come back in and testify that God loves us and that He lives. We were clashing, to say the least.

But everything started to change this week. I woke up one day and remembered what Dad told me about 100 times before my mission that sometimes your companion can be your mission. As I laid on the floor doing my morning sit-ups I resolved that by the end of that day that Elder Fernandez and I would be best friends. I started very simply by asking him what kind of music he liked. We talked about music, I found he liked the Beatles, we sang Beatles songs together in the street when nobody was around, we talked about his family, etc... Well, we still had just as many lessons but at the end of the day I felt something different. It continued into the next couple days. We all of the sudden were very open with each other and talked about everything. With an improved relationship, he was able to give me advice and vice versa. I suggested that we stick to the simple and beautiful doctrines of the Gospel, as Elder David A. Bednar had suggested to us while I was in the MTC. We discussed trying to make others feel comfortable. He asked me how I managed to be so outgoing with these people in a language that isn't my own. We talked about how important it is to keep a smile on your face and show everyone that you are happy to be here. This was advice for myself. Because for more than a week I was miserable with him. I hated every lesson we had together, I hated every contact we did, I got to a point where I was critiquing every little thing he said in my mind. And it finally hit me that morning doing my sit ups. That is exactly what Satan wants. If he can destroy our companionship, we won't be able to teach worth squat. Sure Elder Fernandez is frustrating sometimes, and he still makes me mad the way he wastes money, but I don't let it get to me anymore. I still am smiling today. I will always be in a battle with myself and my perfectionism. I want things to be the best they can be. But I can't let the little things get to me. I justified myself in complaining about my companion because he really did waste all of his money and doesn't wake up on time and etc... But in my justification as I allowed myself to complain I invited the Spirit to leave me and allowed, for a time at least, Satan to continue reminding me just how bad things were. But the truth is that things are great. We are teaching the Restored Gospel of Jesus Christ. It doesn't get any better than that. Things truly are on the up and up. I have never had a more challenging few weeks on the mission, and I have never been happier than I am today. I feel good. I feel peace. And I know that the Lord is proud of me for finally coming to, and recognizing MY pride and MY sin, and He has offered me the comfort I needed. At the end of the day, the only comfort I need is to know that my Savior would say "Well done thou good and faithful servant." I pray I will continue to strive to achieve that feeling at the end of every day. Part of achieving that requires that I have a constant good attitude. I am so grateful for the book of 1 Nephi, because I read it twice this transfer trying to figure out how to have a good attitude. I am smiling again. I am happy.

I don't know if I said any of this at all very well, and I hope it didn't come out like a talk in church. I am doing well. I am happy, healthy, and filthy wealthy. I have to go because I am out of time. I love you all SO much!!

Andy