When it rains it pours‏

email dated 3-4-08
This last week has been the hardest week of my mission up to date. On Tuesday night I was feeling really tired and achy while we were walking home. I couldn't even carry my scripture case, I had to keep switching hands because my arms started hurting so bad. We got home, we planned, and I went straight to bed. I woke up the next morning feeling 10 times worse. My WHOLE body ached, worst of all my back, and my head was pounding and my right ear throbbing and my throat was so sore I could be barely talk. We decided it was best that we didn't go out and work that day. By Thursday morning I wised up and called Hermana (Sister Peterson Mission President´s wife), and told her how I felt. She referred me to a doctor, who informed me I had strep throat and maybe an ear infection. Either way it was an infection of the throat and ear, it is hard to tell in Spanish. Either way, I could tell it was bad for myself by using my flashlight in the mirror. My neck was SO swollen. I was hurting, to say the least. Anyway, I was smart and said we had to go out, at least to visit our investigators with baptismal date, on Thursday afternoon, even though I didn't feel any better. So we did. Out and about, for only an hour and a half, it was just enough time to find out that somehow, Silvia´s ex-husband had come and taken her somewhere long enough to convince her that he truly did love her, even though he beats her, and she bought it! After she had already told him to get lost!!! WOMEN!!! Why do you let yourselves be abused!!?? When I met her she had a black eye from that over controlling, very domineering, professional boxer, who likes to drink alcohol when he isn't fighting. It is a really bad combination. But what hurts me most is that her 4 adorable kids, 10 year old Melanie, 8 year old Emiliano, 5 year old Maria, and 2 year old Alison, are all living under the roof of that man. All the sudden my heart ached more than my body. We went home after being out a few hours Thursday, and we visited our other Silvia with a baptismal date and she was fine, anyway... we went home and I crashed and fell asleep the rest of the day. (Fun fact before we continue, I was able to buy Antibiotics over the counter without a doctor´s signature or anything, but I still was referred to the drug by the doctor). So Friday morning I was still too sick to go out, but I wanted to talk to Silvia. She was SO converted. She had born her testimony to us with tear filled eyes how she could feel the changes in her life and that she loved it. I guess loneliness came in or something. So I called her, or at least tried. Her man answered the phone, and it is a miracle I was as cordial as I was. After informing him that it was the missionaries that were calling, he replied this way. "Habla el esposo de ella(her husband is speaking), y estoy su esposo y voy a decir lo que es que ella puede hacer" o algo asi, which means more or less that he is in charge and he will tell her what she can and cant do. I said I was calling to remind her about her baptismal interview for that afternoon. He again reminded me that he was her husband and that he would speak for her. He started this long religious shpeel about Jehovah and something but I was so fuming mad I didn't have patience to listen and I cut him off "STOP! Can I talk to HER?"... I got lucky and he let me. I asked her if she was going to come to her baptismal interview. She confused, asked "but I am back with my husband? I can still be baptized?". "If you are legally married" I responded, "you aren't breaking the law of chastity". In my head I thought "you are being stupid, but you aren't breaking any commandments". She said how she wanted to try visiting the new ward where she is now living and such. I started to explain to her that she would have to talk to the missionaries over there and her husband took the phone back!!! He came back on. "Hey, did you know I am her husband?" Annoyed I replied "ya sé", I already know. He continued some shpeel about how he was in charge because he is her husband, etc... I eventually said "gracias, ciao", and that was the end of my story with Silvia and her kids.

Still very sick this Friday, we had our baptismal interview with our other candidate, a 14 year old girl who really is amazing. She is the most intelligent young woman I have met yet in Artigas. Anyway, still sick we started walking to the church. The sunny skies changed in a matter of 2 minutes to completely cloudy and the flash flood came. Rain here is weird like that. The skies can fill in 2 seconds and the next thing you know it is pouring, because the rain just drops. Running towards the chapel, absolutely drenched, still sick with an ear infection and strep throat, I found myself thinking "wow, when it rains it pours."

I recall that just last week I wrote "I LOVE BEING A MISSIONARY". I want to restate that I LOVE BEING A MISSIONARY! This is how I know the mission has been good for me. As we were running in the rain all I thought was "wow, when it rains it pours." It was a calm statement to myself, but I wasn't complaining. I never once thought "Well there goes 6 weeks of work. That was a waste!", I never thought "Well this sucks! Why am I sick right now, running in the rain, and losing my baptisms, what´s the deal God?", etc... I never thought any of that! A younger Andy Shepherd would have been upset. A younger Andy Shepherd would have said "woe is me". But I didn't. I laid on the chapel floor, absolutely soaked feeling like I was going to puke because I had run in the rain, I honestly did begin thinking what the next step for me was. I recognized, to myself, that I wasn't complaining. I was fine. Besides being physically sick, I was fine. I was sad, I wont say that I wasn't sad. My heart ACHES for those kids who live with that abusive man. My heart aches for Silvia, who has been so abused and so confused in her life that she has found herself back in the arms of that man. I felt sad for them, but I did not feel sad for me. When I recognized that sentiment coming from myself, I thanked God for my trials. I thanked God for my mission so far. I thanked Him for my opportunity to see just how much I have grown. I never would have noticed that growth without having the experiences I did last week, and climaxing that Friday in the rain. But now I see just how much I have grown. Now I see why I really do love being a missionary. The number one blessing of being a missionary is the growth that is happening within myself. I still feel a little bit sick today, but I feel peace of heart to know that after all that, at the end of the day I feel that my Savior would say to me "Well done thou good and faithful servant." Oh está, todo bien!! All is well!

This week is transfers, that is why I am writing on Tuesday. My companion is leaving, and I am staying in Artigas again. My new companion will be a native from Chile named Elder Fernandez. I am really excited to get my first native companion because I am going to learn ALOT more Spanish from him. I am excited for the next change and to see what challenges Artigas 4 has to bring me for the next 6 weeks. I pray everyone is doing well. I love you all so much!!

Andy